Your mama is so funny looking that when the doctor called her, he said, "Never visit me again. I hope you die!"
Said Jokes
My fitness guru said that if I got raped, it would help me in future marathons.
I asked my class what comes before 47. Everyone said 46, except for the quiet kid who said, "AK."
I robbed a person in a wheelchair. He cried and said: "You can run, but you can't hide." I ran, and I never saw him again.
My friend said to me that I am gay. My response? I’m as straight as that pole that your mum danced on last night.
When I saw a kid fall with no legs, I said, "Just walk it off!"
Your mom is so fat that when God said, "Let there be light," he asked your mom to move out of the way.
Some people put zodiacs on everything.
They said they couldn’t go to the party because of cancer.
Your hairline is so bald, Mr. Clean even said it's bald!
Tony's wife got a divorce from Tony. She said she wanted to be an independent woman.
Days later, Tony's wife had an accident. Guess who's crawling back for help. 💀
Guys, the person that said "suck a dick" was Mase. His real name is Mason, so ya.
If I had a dollar for every time you said something smart, I'd be broke.
So I went to Comic-Con and saw a man with an arm missing, and I thought, "Cool display," until I heard him screaming and getting the other arm chopped off. Then I said, "Man, now that's a 10/10 display, wow!"
A man and a boy were walking through a dark forest. The boy said, “I’m scared.” The man said, “Why are you scared? I’m the one who’s going to leave these woods alone.”
I went down to my fridge to grab my dinner. I said to the children, "Who's next?"
One day I met a blind guy and I said, "You should see Mt. Cheaha!"
I asked an orphan where his mom was. He started crying, so I said it again.
And well, that was my last day at the orphanage.
I broke my arm yesterday. My bro said it is Arm-ageddon, and I still don’t know why.
So, I saw two homeless people on the road fighting. I said, "Stop fighting and go home." I guess it was a little insensitive.
What did the bowler say when the balls were on the lane and the pin? They said, "Strike!" 😂😂😂😂
