Run

Run jokes

Terrorist

    • A Russian, a Brit, and a terrorist are in an air balloon.

    First, the Russian says, "I dare to throw a stone down!" So he does that, but the others don't seem to be impressed. So the Brit says, "I dare to throw a brick down!" So again he does that, the Russian is impressed, but the terrorist laughs and says, "I dare to throw a bomb down!" So he does that and everybody can't believe what they have just seen. So a bit further, they land, and a shocked and afraid little boy comes running up to them. So they ask what happened, on which the little boy said, "I farted and my school exploded."

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    Batman

    • Robin asks Batman what he is getting his parents for Christmas. Batman gets mad, slaps Robin, and runs off crying.

    Now you know why Batman Beyond was born when Bruce died. cause of death: suicide

    Friend

    • Jay and Andrew are best friends who are almost alike. The difference between them both is Jay is poor and well... Andrew, on the other hand, is suck-a-dick poor. Let me explain, Jay wakes up in his room, walks to the kitchen, and asks his mom, Lisa (I call her Lisa now, btw), if there is anything to eat. "No, bitch!" she replies, so Jay drinks a glass of milk and goes back to bed.

    Now Andrew... wakes up, jumps out of bed, and he's in the kitchen. He sees his mom fixing some food for work after a long hard night of giving her husband blue balls. "Anything left for me, Mother?" Andrew asks. "Sorry, Honey, I have to eat to put food on the table and to get the running again." *so she goes to work, taking her time* Andrew sits by his bedside and says to himself, "Man... I'd suck a dick for some water right now." *his mom storms back after hearing what he had said* "I'll buy you a soda if you do my first customer for me!"

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    Crash

    • I was riding my bike down the road!

    When a car started coming, I started running.

    It put me in a crash with my elbow through my ass! ;)

    Run memes
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    Pizza

    • A no legged manager runs the nearest pizza place called Your Pizza Is A Joke.

    I (J0K35) worked there and this happened...

    Manager: WHY ARE THE PINEAPPLES IN THE TRASH?

    Me: Because nobody eats fucking pineapple pizza.

    Manager: THAT'S IT! I'M KICKING YOU OUT OF THIS PLACE!

    Me: You can't kick me out.

    Manager: Why not? Huh?

    Me: Because you need legs to kick, and you don't have any.

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    Panda

    • Ever wonder why pandas are endangered? Well, China's overcrowded, and therefore they're starving. They have to eat...

    Panda: "My god. They're coming! Run! They're hungry! Run! Roll down the hill!"

    Chinese People At Bottom Of Mountain With Spears: "Ching chong wing bong KABOB!!!"

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    Doctor

    • A man came running into a hospital saying, "Doctor, Doctor! I can't feel my legs!"

    The doctor replied, "I know I amputated your arms!"

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    Tap

    • What's the difference between Stephen Hawking and a tap?

    The tap can run.