Athletics jokes
"White people can't jump"...
"You must not have seen the twin towers on 9/11."
I bet China can be the best baseball team. They took out the entire world with just a bat.
What's a lesbian's favorite sport? Dodgeball.
What do you call an athlete who injured 75% of his spine?
A quarterback.
Why does Mexico never hold the Olympics? Because everyone that can run, jump, and swim is already out of the country.
Why can't orphans play baseball?
Because they can't find home.
Ball so hard! 😂🤣
Why does Mexico not have a good athletics team? Because anyone who can run or jump is already over the wall.
What's a Latino's favorite sport? Lacrosse.
Playing soccer in a wheelchair is basically Rocket League in real life.
What do Olympic sprinters eat before a race?
Nothing. They fast!
What’s something you can say during a pregnancy test and during a sporting event?
"We’ve got a runner!"
What's better than winning the Paralympics wheelchair race?
Walking.
I know a girl in a wheelchair. I realize now why she couldn’t do sports because the coaches wanted 100% from her, but she was only able to give 50%.
"I'm very good in sports."
"In which sports?"
"EA Sports."
What does a person eat before a race?
Answer: They fast.
A skinny black person named "Treyvon Robinson" joins a pickup basketball game at the local court, trash-talking about his "superior athletic genes" while munching on a stolen bag of Skittles. The ref blows the whistle for a foul, and he argues, "That ain't fair, I'm just naturally dominant!"
But the team's coach, a burly black dude who's been eyeing him all game, grabs him by the jersey, blindfolds him with a sweaty headband, slathers lube from his gym bag all over, and pile-drives his ass courtside in a twisted BDSM slam dunk, yelling, "Now taste the rainbow, punk!"
Guy is at athletic meet. Asks guy if he is a pole vaulter.
He replies, "No I am German and how did you know my name was Walter?"
Why are orphans terrible at baseball? They never get home runs.
What is the Mexican's favorite sport?
Cross country, wall climbing, and their favorite activity in the summer is lawn mowing.