Robot jokes
What do robots 🤖 shave with?
Laser blades!
Dad: Son, do you want to play Rock 'Em Sock 'Em Robots?
Son: Sure, let me get it from the closet.
Dad: No, bring your sisters. Just like the game, they can’t move their legs.
Mother, father, and a son. Father purchased a robot that can detect lies. The robot slaps when you lie.
During dinner time: Father: Son, what have you done today? Son: I watched Netflix, Dad. Robot: Stood up and slapped the son! Son: Okay! Okay! I watched porn, Dad. Dad: What? You watched porn? You are only 14! I never knew porn till I was 18 years of age. Robot: Stood up and slapped the Dad! Mother: Started to laugh and said "Sure he is your son!" Robot: Stood up and slapped the mother!
Hehe
Types "I'm not a robot" on computer.
Son, we are geniuses!
I saw a cyclist in the road today, so I ran over him and he said in a robotic voice, "SHUTTING DOWN!"
me when my friend brings another person you despise with your whole body.
If Stephen Hawking was in a horror movie, would he make his robot try and shout, "Aaaaaaaah! Help me, I can't move! I'm too scared!"?
I'm not a robot, but orphans are.
What is one question on a tech test you should always ask before getting down?
What in the Robot!?
You know what really grinds my gears? Robots and liars...for example that Stephen Hawking fella. He sure looks and sounds like a robot!! And a major liar too! If he wanted to show me how smart he really was he would have figured out how to get up out of that four wheeler and tell me how smart he is!!!!!
You: Hey, Alexa, what is your gender?
Alexa: I identify as Michael Jackson, and my pronouns are...
Me: *hears it* And their pronouns are he/he.
What do you call a bored robot?
A “sigh”-borg.
Q: Why couldn’t Poe Dameron find his sandwich?
A: Because BB-8 it.
Ya it's bad:)
What do you call an autistic kid who just saw Transformers? Autistimus Prime.
What happens when the terminator pees?
Gasoline descent.
My girlfriend told me she was leaving me because I keep pretending to be a Transformer. I said, "No, wait! I can change."
What do you call Stephen Hawking on Mars? Mars Rover.
What do you call a droid that takes the long way around?
R2 Detour.
In the Robocide, Explain Bear is the first to go.
What's Stephen Hawking's favorite food? His left shoulder.
What's Stephen Hawking's favorite robot? Him as his shoulder/wheelchair.
Who is going to start the robot takeover? Me.