Roast

Roast jokes

Mum

Your mum is so fat, when she slept on the bed, the bed cracked and they had to replace it by a dinosaur.

Comeback

Ex-bf's gf: You're so ugly as hell.

Me: Oh, did I mention that I was trying to be you?

Rose

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I thank God I'm not as ugly as you.

Sun

Why is the sun so mean? Because it keeps ROASTING everyone!

Receipt

I don't care if I got beat the first day you were born. Your momma asked for a receipt!

Head

Egg shaped, dome, bowling ball lookin' ass, bald fuck with that 360 degrees ahh head, motherfucker look like a damn balloon.

Call me Kobe 'cause I'm finna use your head as a basketball and throw it at yo' parents. Mr. Clean, bootleg Saitama lookin' ass mfer. No hair? :(

Forehead

Does that neverending forehead of yours go all the way to Mars, holy fucking shit?

Pig

What’s the difference between a pig and Maddie McCann?

Least a pig had an apple in its mouth when it was spit roasted.

  • 1
  • Cloud

    You're like a stormy cloud, because once you go away, it's a nice day.

    Bar

    A Snorlax was in a bar, and he was drinking beer when an Eevee and a Rockruff hopped onto a stool. The Eevee ordered an oran berry special for the both of them.

    Snorlax: Y'all make the perfect couple.

    Random Zorua: Dragonite, is it just an illusion, or is that Snorlax fatter than this region?