Roast jokes
Why shouldn't you make fun of burn victims?
Because they've already been roasted!
I'm Black, when a cop sees me, he shoots.
Your face makes onions cry.
2+2+67+23= Now calculate the mass of the Solar system. Be these questions these days.
I forgot the world revolves around you. My apologies! How silly of me.
Joe Mama is so fat that when she sat on an iPhone, it turned into an iPod.
"Go back to Party City, where you belong!" — Phi Phi O’Hara, RuPaul’s Drag Race.
You bring everyone so much joy when you leave the room.
Yo mama is so short, Minions look down at her.
Yo mama is so fat that she volunteered for the Hunger Games 'cause she thought it was an eating competition.
Yo mama is so ugly when Santa Claus saw her, he yelled "Ho Ho Holy Sh*t!"
Yo mama is so old, when she walked into an antique store, they didn't let her leave.
Yo mama is so stupid, she sold her car for gas money.
Bully: Shut up.
Me: I don't shut up, I grow up, and when I look at you, I throw up.
I bet you're a child molester who got out of jail and is now sexually harassing kids such as Addison! Will fuck off and get a life, btw your roasts are not fucking funny, they're bullshit like your face and your hairline.
If you're in a roast battle with a homophobe and they are talking mad shit, just say:
"The only thing looser than your mouth is your asshole!"
What's the difference between a boomerang and your dad?
Boomerangs come back.
Yep, if someone says to you, "I can't roast trash," say, "Well, some trash is used for recycling, and that is why you have a baby brother!"
I have to take out the trash, but I couldn't find you.
You call me ugly, but maybe that is why we look alike.
I got a bowl of rice that you're formed like, an ice cube.
Me: Do you know a funny joke?
Friend: Yes, you.
Why did the Chicken cross the road? You: Why? To get to the little b***h's house!
Knock knock! You: Who's there? The chicken!
What’s the difference between a pig and Maddie McCann?
Least a pig had an apple in its mouth when it was spit roasted.