Roast

Roast jokes

Mama

Yo mama so fat...

That when she used a jump rope... Every time she jumped caused a giant cataclysm!

Poo

My mum told me to do the dog poo, but I couldn't find you anywhere.

Alien

Me: Are you an alien?

Friend: No.

Me: Yeah, because you're too ugly to be one.

Dog

I can never get away from my dog, he follows me everywhere. I think you two would be really good friends.

Mama

Your mama is so fat, she sunk Atlantis even though it's in the ocean!

Trash

I went to take out the trash, could not find you, so I went back in. The next day I found you.

Guy

Guy: Are you tired?

His “Crush”: No.

Guy: Are you sure, because you’ve been running through my mind all day?

His “Crush”: That’s sweet.

Guy: I’m joking, you don’t look like you do any running.

Orphan

The one good thing about an orphan is that they don't get roasted with a "yo mama" joke.

Appearance

You’re looking pretty rough this evening. You look like if sweatpants were a person.

Time

When I look at you, I wish I could meet you again for the first time... and walk past.