Roast jokes
Your hairline goes back to the first century.
You are so fat that when you jump into the pool, everyone gets out.
Yo mama so fat...
That when she used a jump rope... Every time she jumped caused a giant cataclysm!
My mum told me to do the dog poo, but I couldn't find you anywhere.
Me: Are you an alien?
Friend: No.
Me: Yeah, because you're too ugly to be one.
You're like a cat, all you do is eat and sleep.
I can never get away from my dog, he follows me everywhere. I think you two would be really good friends.
Your mama is so fat, she sunk Atlantis even though it's in the ocean!
The first time I heard your voice, my foreskin fell off.
You were born on a highway in a car crash, I wonder why.
You are like a thunderstorm; when you go away, like your dad, everyone is happy.
Daday, chill, piss. Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
"Bully," omg, that girl is so ugly.
"Me," Wait, what...ever.
I went to take out the trash, could not find you, so I went back in. The next day I found you.
Guy: Are you tired?
His “Crush”: No.
Guy: Are you sure, because you’ve been running through my mind all day?
His “Crush”: That’s sweet.
Guy: I’m joking, you don’t look like you do any running.
The one good thing about an orphan is that they don't get roasted with a "yo mama" joke.
You’re looking pretty rough this evening. You look like if sweatpants were a person.
I'm jealous of the people who never met you.
When I look at you, I wish I could meet you again for the first time... and walk past.
But when?