Roast jokes
You were born on a highway in a car crash, I wonder why.
The first time I heard your voice, my foreskin fell off.
It's kinda sad seeing you attempt to put your whole vocabulary in one sentence. Oh wait, you only said three words.
I would roast you, but you don't have any meat!
Friend: Your t-shirt is cringe.
Me: You should go get the Covid test because one of their symptoms is no taste.
Your forehead is so big you can headbutt my face and chest at the same time.
Your mom is so fat Santa Claus came down and said, "Ho ho holy shit!"
Roses are red, Violets are blue, I thank God I'm not as ugly as you.
My Wife: How much do you love me??
Me: Count all the stars.
My Wife: Aww, infinity.
Me: No, a waste of time.
Me: I need a good roast.
My friend: Take me!
Your mama is so fat, she sunk Atlantis even though it's in the ocean!
Yo mama's so fat, she thinks the buffet is the starter plate.
Yo mama so fat she makes the sun look like a dwarf star!
Yo mama is so fat, the country of Russia isn't big enough to house her!
My friend is so ugly, she got surgery twice, but not even that could fix her.
When you were born, you were so ugly that the doctors slapped your parents!
Roses are red, violets are blue, it's really no wonder your mama left you!
Yo mama so fat...
That when she used a jump rope... Every time she jumped caused a giant cataclysm!
A Snorlax was in a bar, and he was drinking beer when an Eevee and a Rockruff hopped onto a stool. The Eevee ordered an oran berry special for the both of them.
Snorlax: Y'all make the perfect couple.
Random Zorua: Dragonite, is it just an illusion, or is that Snorlax fatter than this region?
My wife told me to pass her lip stick, but I gave her a glue stick. Now she is not talking to me.