Ring jokes
What’s worse than banging your sister?
Having to wear your dad’s wedding ring.
Unfortunately, NASCAR has been canceled.
The woke people heard that it was a human traffic ring.
I heard my neighbors having sex, and it was annoying me, so I called my girlfriend to ask if she wanted to go out, but when I called her, I heard my neighbors' phone ringing.
The other day someone stole my mood ring. I don't know how to feel about that.
"Lord of the Rings" is about a group of white Americans taking nine hours to return jewelry.
What is gayer than man sex ring?
Not slapping the ass at Hooters.
What is Saturn's favorite song?
"7 Rings."
What happens to an Indian's doorbell when you ring it?
A ring-a-ding-a-ding.
Yo mama so poor, when I ring the doorbell, she says, "DING!"
My wife is so fat! When she goes swimming, she leaves a ring around the lake.
Twin monks who ring the church bells died.
Now they are dead ringers. :)
Person: My left ear is ringing.
Friend: Then answer it!
A Chinese teacher's phone rang as he was going to class, and he said:
"My phone the ring ring, it's my wife ring ring."
What is God's favorite planet?
Saturn because it has a ring around it.
Why do planets circle the sun?
'Cause they like the game of ring-around-the-rosy.
A rich man and a poor man are talking about anniversaries. The rich man got his wife a Mercedes and a diamond ring. He says if the wife does not like the ring, she can take the Mercedes and leave.
The poor man said he got his wife slippers and a dildo. He says if his wife does not like the slippers, she can go and fuck herself.
Why did Saturn have rings?
Because God liked it so he put a ring on it.
Why is Ronan's forehead the size of Jupiter? Because he dropped the TV on his forehead. It also had rings.
Why is Jupiter's ring stuck in orbit? Because Ronan's forehead kept it stuck in orbit.
Snails are like sperm, slow and sloppy.
Phone rings; "Are your parents home?"
Orphan; "Stop calling here!"
What’s black and rings the doorbell?
Stevie Wonder answering the iron.