Right Jokes

My name is myria my right nut

What do you call a blank piece of paper??

Women rights

the toothbrush Says'' i have the worst job in the whole world''. the toilet paper behind him''yeah right''.

toothbrush: i think i have the worst job ever toiletpaper: ya,right

You know what a triangle has that women's rights don't? A point.

There are two kids sitting in a classroom Lily and john Lily sleeps in class everyday.The teacher asks lily who made heaven and earth john pokes her with a pencil she shouts JESUS CHRIST ALMIGHTY teacher says that's right the teacher says the next day she asks the same question john pokes her with a pencil she shouts JESUS CHRIST ALMIGHTY that's right the teacher says next day she asks lily what did Eve say to adam after their 100th john pokes her again IF YOU STICK THAT THING IN ME ONE MORE TIME IMMA BREAK IT IN HALF she shouts.

If the longest word in history is pneumonoultramicroscopicsilicovolcanoconiosis, then it's big cousin would something longer, right?

Nope, something way longer. BEHO-methionyl​threonyl​threonyl​glutaminyl​alanyl​prolyl​threonyl​phenyl​alanyl​threonyl​glutaminyl​prolyl​leucyl​glutaminyl​seryl​valyl​valyl​valyl​leucyl​glutamyl​glycyl​seryl​threonyl​alanyl​threonyl​phenyl​alanyl​glutamyl​alanyl​histidyl​isoleucyl​seryl​glycyl​phenyl​alanyl​prolyl​valyl​prolyl​glutamyl​valyl​seryl​tryptophyl​phenyl​alanyl​arginyl​aspartyl​glycyl​glutaminyl​valyl​isoleucyl​seryl​threonyl​seryl​threonyl​leucyl​prolyl​glycyl​valyl​glutaminyl​isoleucyl​seryl​phenyl​alanyl​seryl​aspartyl​glycyl​arginyl​alanyl​lysyl​leucyl​threonyl​isoleucyl​prolyl​alanyl​valyl​threonyl​lysyl​alanyl​asparaginyl​seryl​glycyl​arginyl​tyrosyl​seryl​leucyl​lysyl​alanyl​threonyl​asparaginyl​glycyl​seryl​glycyl​glutaminyl​alanyl​threonyl​seryl​threonyl​alanyl​glutamyl​leucyl​leucyl​valyl​lysyl​alanyl​glutamyl​threonyl​alanyl​prolyl​prolyl​asparaginyl​phenyl​alanyl​valyl​glutaminyl​arginyl​leucyl​glutaminyl​seryl​methionyl​threonyl​valyl​arginyl​glutaminyl​glycyl​seryl​glutaminyl​valyl​arginyl​leucyl​glutaminyl​valyl​arginyl​valyl​threonyl​glycyl​isoleucyl​prolyl​asparaginyl​prolyl​valyl​valyl​lysyl​phenyl​alanyl​tyrosyl​arginyl​aspartyl​glycyl​alanyl​glutamyl​isoleucyl​glutaminyl​seryl​seryl​leucyl​aspartyl​phenyl​alanyl​glutaminyl​isoleucyl​seryl​glutaminyl​glutamyl​glycyl​aspartyl​leucyl​tyrosyl​seryl​leucyl​leucyl​isoleucyl​alanyl​glutamyl​alanyl​tyrosyl​prolyl​glutamyl​aspartyl​seryl​glycyl​threonyl​tyrosyl​seryl​valyl​asparaginyl​alanyl​threonyl​asparaginyl​seryl​valyl​glycyl​arginyl​alanyl​threonyl​seryl​threonyl​alanyl​glutamyl​leucyl​leucyl​valyl​glutaminyl​glycyl​glutamyl​glutamyl​glutamyl​valyl​prolyl​alanyl​lysyl​lysyl​threonyl​lysyl​threonyl​isoleucyl​valyl​seryl​threonyl​alanyl​glutaminyl​isoleucyl​seryl​glutamyl​seryl​arginyl​glutaminyl​threonyl​arginyl​isoleucyl​glutamyl​lysyl​lysyl​isoleucyl​glutamyl​alanyl​histidyl​phenyl​alanyl​aspartyl​alanyl​arginyl​seryl​isoleucyl​alanyl​threonyl​valyl​glutamyl​methionyl​valyl​isoleucyl​aspartyl​glycyl​alanyl​alanyl​glycyl​glutaminyl​glutaminyl​leucyl​prolyl​histidyl​lysyl​threonyl​prolyl​prolyl​arginyl​isoleucyl​prolyl​prolyl​lysyl​prolyl​lysyl​seryl​arginyl​seryl​prolyl​threonyl​prolyl​prolyl​seryl​isoleucyl​alanyl​alanyl​lysyl​alanyl​glutaminyl​leucyl​alanyl​arginyl​glutaminyl​glutaminyl​seryl​prolyl​seryl​prolyl​isoleucyl​arginyl​histidyl​seryl​prolyl​seryl​prolyl​valyl​arginyl​histidyl​valyl​arginyl​alanyl​prolyl​threonyl​prolyl​seryl​prolyl​valyl​arginyl​seryl​valyl​seryl​prolyl​alanyl​alanyl​arginyl​isoleucyl​seryl​threonyl​seryl​prolyl​isoleucyl​arginyl​seryl​valyl​arginyl​seryl​prolyl​leucyl​leucyl​methionyl​arginyl​lysyl​threonyl​glutaminyl​alanyl​seryl​threonyl​valyl​alanyl​threonyl​glycyl​prolyl​glutamyl​valyl​prolyl​prolyl​prolyl​tryptophyl​lysyl​glutaminyl​glutamyl​glycyl​tyrosyl​valyl​alanyl​seryl​seryl​seryl​glutamyl​alanyl​glutamyl​methionyl​arginyl​glutamyl​threonyl​threonyl​leucyl​threonyl​threonyl​seryl​threonyl​glutaminyl​isoleucyl​arginyl​threonyl​glutamyl​glutamyl​arginyl​tryptophyl​glutamyl​glycyl​arginyl​tyrosyl​glycyl​valyl​glutaminyl​glutamyl​glutaminyl​valyl​threonyl​isoleucyl​seryl​glycyl​alanyl​alanyl​glycyl​alanyl​alanyl​alanyl​seryl​valyl​seryl​alanyl​seryl​alanyl​seryl​tyrosyl​alanyl​alanyl​glutamyl​alanyl​valyl​alanyl​threonyl​glycyl​alanyl​lysyl​glutamyl​valyl​lysyl​glutaminyl​aspartyl​alanyl​aspartyl​lysyl​seryl​alanyl​alanyl​valyl​alanyl​threonyl​valyl​valyl​alanyl​alanyl​valyl​aspartyl​methionyl​alanyl​arginyl​valyl​arginyl​glutamyl​prolyl​valyl​isoleucyl​seryl​alanyl​valyl​glutamyl​glutaminyl​threonyl​alanyl​glutaminyl​arginyl​threonyl​threonyl​threonyl​threonyl​alanyl​valyl​histidyl​isoleucyl​glutaminyl​prolyl​alanyl​glutaminyl​glutamyl​glutaminyl​valyl​arginyl​lysyl​glutamyl​alanyl​glutamyl​lysyl​threonyl​alanyl​valyl​threonyl​lysyl​valyl​valyl​valyl​alanyl​alanyl​aspartyl​lysyl​alanyl​lysyl​glutamyl​glutaminyl​glutamyl​leucyl​lysyl​seryl​arginyl​threonyl​lysyl​glutamyl​isoleucyl​isoleucyl​threonyl​threonyl​lysyl​glutaminyl​glutamyl​glutaminyl​methionyl​histidyl​valyl​threonyl​histidyl​glutamyl​glutaminyl​isoleucyl​arginyl​lysyl​glutamyl​threonyl​glutamyl​lysyl​threonyl​phenyl​alanyl​valyl​prolyl​lysyl​valyl​valyl​isoleucyl​seryl​alanyl​alanyl​lysyl​alanyl​lysyl​glutamyl​glutaminyl​glutamyl​threonyl​arginyl​isoleucyl​seryl​glutamyl​glutamyl​isoleucyl​threonyl​lysyl​lysyl​glutaminyl​lysyl​glutaminyl​valyl​threonyl​glutaminyl​glutamyl​alanyl​isoleucyl​methionyl​lysyl​glutamyl​threonyl​arginyl​lysyl​threonyl​valyl​valyl​prolyl​lysyl​valyl​isoleucyl​valyl​alanyl​threonyl​prolyl​lysyl​valyl​lysyl​glutamyl​glutaminyl​aspartyl​leucyl​valyl​seryl​arginyl​glycyl​arginyl​glutamyl​glycyl​isoleucyl​threonyl​threonyl​lysyl​arginyl​glutamyl​glutaminyl​valyl​glutaminyl​isoleucyl​threonyl​glutaminyl​glutamyl​lysyl​methionyl​arginyl​lysyl​glutamyl​alanyl​glutamyl​lysyl​threon

Any girl can be a squirter if you hit the right artery.

so I'm readin hamlet right and then this one page they like yo like hamleet the fuck t tgo foff off KING speak yo 😂 😂 😂 😂 😂 😂 😂 truth ong fr 😂 Face withething is funny or ...😂 😂 😂 😂 the

Man: I'm here for the job interview Employer: Oh good, good. Sit down. We don't get many people for the interviews. Man: Just anywhere? Employer: Yeah, make yourself comfortable. Jackson, right? Man: Yeah that's me. (Shakes hands and sits back down) Employer: So what makes you eligible for the job, Jackson? Man: Well, I'm really good at capturing the perfect shot and angle. it really takes dedication to do this type of job. Concentration and willpower, sir. Employer: I like you already, you're hired! Man: Wow thanks, sir. I know i won't do you wrong. I'll work hard for this job! Employer: You start now! Your first person is a man named John F Kennedy. Man: What? You want me to just take pictures of him during the parade? Employer: No. Man: This... This is a photography job right? Employer: No... this is a job employment for man hunting.

1.) What’s Yellow And Can’t Swim? - A Bus Full Of Children 2.) Did you hear bout the pilsbury dough boy? - he died of a yeast infection 3.) I will never forget my grandads last words... - “you’re still holding the ladder right?” 4.) I have a fish that can breakdance... - only for 20 seconds though, and only once 5.) give a man a match and he will be warm for a few hours... - lite a man on fire and he will be warm for the rest of his life

I'm in a wheelchair right so I've tried everything but one stand up

It didn't work

I asked a girl I met if I could take her out to dinner The joke is I new right after she said I'll call you She was lying to me, not surprised even a little The next joke was a part of me hoped she would call , but did I really think she was going to, I'll never be good enough for anyone, what was I thinking, why did I even bother to ask her in the first place, I think it was just to prove I was right , I'm unwanted LONELINESS EQUALS SADNESS

Why is a brick always hard because he seen the brick that was getting laid right next to him.

Why did the orphan cross the road

He thought he saw his parents

Oasis am I right

I'm reading this book in braille right now, and I know something's gonna happen, I can just feel it.

Why cant orphans Be gay

Because they have no one to cal daddy

Guy: Fight me on Xbox. Guy: oh right you don't have one *laughs* Me: Fight me in real life. Me: Oh right you don't have a real life. *INSERTS APPLE BOTTOM JEANS* 2021-2022

Jk: jimin why are you so small? Jm: excujjimi? Jk: no offense jim jm: yah call me hyung! Jk: but im bigger jm: im older! Jk: im tge top and your tge bottom so i dobt think its right to call you hyung.. jm:......

I've got not much of anything to be honest Been in special classes in school Not liked by people Only relationship I've ever had and she cheated on me 31 years old and never had sex pathetic Not very smart Don't look good Hate myself more than anything Been a failure at everything in life Probably be alone forever People treat me like crap Can't do anything right And the list goes on and on

So the question is why haven't I killed myself yet the answer is ,I forget I'm a extreme procrastinator keep just putting it off because I'll probably just fuck it up anyway