Riddles
What's the difference between a sheet and a baby?
One of them is really loud when you iron it.
Why can't people in wheelchairs be gay? Cuz you can't be a fruit and a vegetable at the same time.
Three copycats on a boat, one jumps off. How many are left? Zero, because they're copycats!
What do you call a person with nobody and no nose?
Let’s say there’s a person who should have never come to exist. How would you find them?
A: Look in a mirror.
Q: What do you get when you drop all your potato chips in your couch somewhere?
A: A couch potato. HaHaHa
What's the difference between a battery and my wife? The battery has a positive side.
what's black and red and is a liquid?
my scars!
Why doesn't the Sun go to college? Because it has a million degrees.
What does NASA stand for? Need Another Seven Astronauts.
Little Johnny and his teacher were telling each other jokes and riddles. His teacher asked, "Three birds were sitting on a wire, a hunter shot one. How many are left?" Little Johnny replied, "None, because the sound would scare the other two away." His teacher said, "No, but I like the way you think!"
Little Johnny replied, "Alright, now I have one for you. What goes in dry and hard and comes out soft and hard?" His teacher was shocked and said, "Little Johnny!" He replied, "It's gum! But I like the way you think!"
What starts off fun and ends in bankruptcy?
UNPROTECTED SEX.
Friend: Hey, let me give you a little riddle. There's a table [for] four people who are supposed to sit [at]. There is you, me, Will, Mary. In which order will they sit?
Other friend: Uhm, you, me, Mary, and Will?
Friend 1: Nope, guess again!
Other friend: Okay, what about "Will you marry me?" Oh, wait...
Friend 1: Of course!!!! :D
Who's the Roblox YouTuber that always sees Among Us and says "stupid"?
What has two legs and bleeds? Half a dog.
What pool never runs dry?
The one on the Titanic.
Q. What walks through alleys and has a hole in it?
A. Batman's parents.
What's red and screams when you shake it?
A skinned baby in a bag of salt.
What would fall out of a tree first, a depressed person or a feather?
Answer: The feather wouldn't. The rope would stop the person from falling all the way.
What's red, small, wet, and crawls up your leg?
A homesick abortion.