Restaurant jokes
Why is there no toilet paper at KFC?
Because it's finger lickin' good!
I called the Chinese takeaway yesterday. A man picked up the phone and said: "Hello! I am Wan Kin, the chef." I said that I'll come back later.
"Oh, waiter! Waiter!"
"Yes, sir?"
"Do you have frog's legs?"
"Why, yes."
"Good. Now hop along and get me a steak!"
Me: Have you ever tried African food?
You: No.
Me: They haven't either.
Where's a cannibal's favorite place to eat?
Chili's, because they got them baby back ribs.
Where do rabbits eat breakfast?
IHOP.
Q: What do Burger King and Michael Jackson have in common?
A: They put meat on five-year-old buns.
Hot women with big boobs work at Hooters, but where does a handicap woman work?
IHOP.
Ever tried Ethiopian food? No? Neither have they.
I asked a Japanese chef how to make a good bowl of ramen, he said "Let me show you."
In honor of Diddy:
The ice cream machine at McDonald's now works!
In honor of Michael Jackson, Vienna Beef, as well as other establishments, are introducing the Jackson dog. It's a 50 year old sausage between two 7 year old buns, with everything on it.
Q: What kind of club do roosters go to? A: The Chicken Strip.
I made that one up.
Welcome to Morgan's Morgue and Pizzeria where yesterday's loss is today's sauce!
What is a cannibal's favorite place to eat?
Five Guys.
Q: How did Burger King get Dairy Queen pregnant?
A: He forgot to wrap his Whopper.
Papa John's pizzeria and abortion clinic. You make 'em, we bake 'em.
Who works at IHOP? A girl with one leg.
P1: Why did the chicken cross the road?
P2: To get to the other side DUH?!?
P1: No dumbass, it's to get run over because he has depression, a chronic illness, and his father left him for a good for nothing pimp that doesn’t even give a shit about how he feels. (Kinda like me).
P2: Holy shit are u ok? *Some random eavesdropping fucker dials 911 in a hurry*
Me and my wife were out at dinner. Me being 48 and her being 19, people were screaming at us and calling me a creep. It really ruined our 10th anniversary.
Q: What's a pedophile's favorite place to eat?
A: Schools because there is a wide variety of choices.