Restaurant jokes
How did Burger King get Dairy Queen pregnant?
He forgot to wrap his Whopper.
Can you drive a pizza? Of course, as long as you change the olive oil.
A bear walks into a bar and asks the barkeep, "Can I have a grilled . . . cheese?"
The barkeep asks the bear, "What's with the big pause?" The bear says, "Well, I'm a bear."
Went to my local Indian restaurant and asked the waiter for a chicken tarka Masala.
The waiter said, "What's that?"
I said, "It's the same as a tikka, just a little otter."
What does the cannibal eat who comes late for dinner?
The cold shoulder.
A man and a cow walk into a McDonalds, and the man walks up to the front counter and says, “I’d like one beef burger.” The employee of McDonalds said, “Sure thing sir, also I really like to see your cow, may I bring him into the back room really quick to show my co-workers?” The man says, “Sure.” The employee takes the cow into the back room. A couple minutes later, the employee came back with his burger. The man took a bite of it, and realized his cow was gone.
Have you ever had Ethiopian food?
Don't worry, neither have they.
I love going to Hooters and looking at the menu... If you know what I mean;)
Mama Mia's pizzeria and abortion clinic. Your loss is our sauce.
Have you heard of the restaurant Karma?
There is no menu because you only get what you deserve.
Where did the one legged lady work?
IHOP
We were at a restaurant today, and my dad was talking about a place called Sea Ranch.
I asked, "What do they raise there? Sea horses?"
What do you call a fake noodle?
An impasta.
Man: "Is your body from McDonald's?"
Woman: "Why, because you're loving it?"
Man: "No, because it's fat and greasy."
Can orphans eat at a family restaurant?
What's red, green, and slimy and slides down the chip shop window?
Abortion of chips.
I was out for dinner with my 19 year old girlfriend. I, being 42, had many people shouting at me, scolding me, calling me a creep. It really ruined our 10th anniversary.
My favorite sex position is the McDonald's.
Ba da ba ba ba, I'm lovin' it!
Where's a cannibal's favorite place to eat?
Chili's, because they got them baby back ribs.
What place can you always find suicidal cows at?
"McDonald's."