Religion jokes
Why do Indian men marry fat women?
Because they worship cows.
What is the difference between a nun and a prostitute?
One is for Sunday morning, and one is for Sunday night.
What is the difference between a nun and a prostitute?
One serves the nailed to the cross, one nailed by her boss.
Boy goes to Confession.
Boy: "What are you doing, Father?"
Priest: "It's called masturbation, and soon you will be doing it."
Boy: "Why do you say that, Father?"
Priest: "'Cause my hand is getting tired!"
-not my joke
What did Jesus say when he was left hanging on the cross?
"Well this is one hell of a way to spend my Easter vacation!"
Ever wonder how a Jehovah’s Witness spreads their word during Covid?
Now that you’re here, do you have a moment to talk about our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ?
What do you call a space Muslim?
A Tusken Raider.
Why can't Jesus eat M&Ms?
They'll fall right through his hands.
What's the difference between Jesus and a picture? You need only one nail to hang a picture, unfortunately.
Q: Why can’t Jesus make fun of gay people?
A: He got nailed first.
"And the Lord said unto John, 'Come forth and receive eternal life,' but John came fifth and got a toaster."
What does a Jewish man say when he sees a caricature of his face?
"We need to circumcise that one."
What do u call a Muslim praying: Allahu akbar.
Q: What do Moses and hookers have in common?
A: They've dealt with a burning bush.
There never was a historical Jesus Christ. Hey, do not even dream of crucifying me.
What's the slogan for a Muslim gym?
Might in dynamite.
Why do orphans like to go to church?
So they have someone to call father.
If you're bored, punch an orphan in the face. What is he gonna do, tell his parents?
You should know it's important to wash your sex toys. That's why priests invented baptism.
Jesus saved me from eternal fate, but I didn't want to get saved. I was about to fight Satan on Final Destination before facing and kicking God's ass.
I pray to a dead human I hope to be reunited with.
Jesus, that's sick.