Allahu Akbar.
I wish everyone spoke to each other the way God did.
God is good. God is great.
God bless the shooting that happened.
Yo mama so old, she witnessed Noah building the ark.
What do you call the nun that hates?
For Paul Walker, Mother Teresa.
What's the definition of suspicious?...
A nun doing sit-ups in a cucumber field. 💀
"Pray to God her inside her head. I'm scared of God."
The Flanders Song
God said to Noah, "There’s gonna be a floody-floody."
Rain came down, it started to get muddy-muddy.
Get these animals👏out of the arky-arky."
"Leave me alone!"
What do you call a gay priest? Hahahahahaha!
Hey kids, are you ready for Faptisim?
Why did my dad bring a bomb vest to fit in with his Taliban brothers?
I asked God why nobody likes me. He showed a reflection of myself.
We say “Father, I have sinned,” because it would be weird if we said, “Daddy, I have sinned,” right?
“Forgive me, Daddy, for my transgressions!” We say the “Our Father,” not the “Our Daddy.”
siens gets you to the moon religion flighs you into buildings
A bus full of ugly people is driving down the street. The bus crashes and everyone goes to heaven. They see Saint Peter, and he feels bad for them and grants them one wish before they go into heaven. The first one says, "I wish to be attractive." The second one says the same.
Meanwhile, the 3rd person in line is giggling and snickering and laughing while Saint Peter is granting wishes. Curiously, he asks why he is laughing. He says, "I was going to wish that they turned ugly again."
Jesus was a carpenter who got nailed to a piece of wood
I have one policy and that is to not make fun of black people. Sorry jesus. You were white in the bible pictures.
I was talking to a close friend that was Islamic.
He said he was being shipped to an amazing training.
I asked, "Where are you going?"
He said, "Camp Bin Laden."
I asked, "What do they do there?"
He answered, "They got bomb training and hand to hand combat training. Plus they got arts and crafts."
I asked, "What do you mean by arts and crafts?"
He said, "See this towel on my head?" I nodded. "I made it out of boxer jokes."
God
