Religion jokes
What do you call a sex offender attending church? A priest.
Where did Noah keep his bees? -- In the ark hives.
How did the blind Catholic get in a car crash? He asked Jesus to take the wheel.
"Amen, "Amen," "Amen."
Hail Satan.
............
Oh, sorry. I forgot which religion I was pretending to respect.
What do you call a religious drug addict?
A crystal methodist.
Memes
What do the initials BIBLE stand for?
"Bullshit In Book Lacking Evidence."
No one:
Nothing:
Not a single f***ing soul:
Spanish Empire: DING DONG YOUR RELIGION IS WRONG!
Who was the first carpenter?
Eve, she made Adam's banana stand...
Whats the difference between NASA and religion
NASA takes you through space Religion takes you through two towers
Whoever invented religions, they fucked up.
We got all kinds of retarded adults believing in mythologies.
How do you make holy water?
You boil the hell out of it.
I only believe in 12.5% of everything the Bible says.
Which makes me an eighth-theist.
How do you get a nun pregnant? -- Dress her up as an alter boy.
What is the difference between giving money to a prostitute and giving money to a church? A prostitute won't tell you that it is more blessed to give than it is to receive.
Heterosexual sodomy is like religion. If you were forced to accept it when you were younger, you probably would not like it when you become an adult.
Religion... That is all.
The oldest computer can be traced back to Adam and Eve. It was an apple, but with extremely limited memory. Just 1 byte. And then everything crashed.
What is the difference between giving money to a church and giving money to the IRS?
If you stop giving money to a church, you won't go to prison.
What is the difference between giving money to a prostitute and giving money to a church? You don't get something in return if you give money to a church.
A priest, a rapist, a pedophile, and a homosexual walk into a bar.
He orders a drink.