Relationship jokes
Oh, brother!
One day my ex-best friend lied about his computer dying when he left the call and watched YouTube.
My sister was hitting on my boyfriend. I'm 11, she's 9. She said, "Go f-ck yourself," so I said, "Okay, thanks for the idea!"
I'm ashamed to admit feeling proud of the rape joke I posted and what went on between me and your mum.
A couple enters a Chinese restaurant and takes their seats.
The waiter asks, "想吃什么 (Xiang Chi Shen Ma)?"
The wife responds, "吃鸡巴 (Chi Ji Ba)!"
I caught my wife having s*x with another guy.
A hand is always sad when it sees a dick is going inside.
I miss Gwen.
What do you call your mom? Gay.
What actor do orphans hate?
Dom Terreto (family).
Your mom said I was ugly. I told her she couldn’t see her belly button because she was so fat. She said, “I thought I was the only one without one!”
Gutted rn... the girl I loved hard just got in a relationship. She liked me too so I missed the chance. Idk if she still does... man...
Jack and Jill went up a hill, each with a buck and a quarter.
Jill came down, and she had two-fifty! Oh, what a whore! (Andrew Dice Clay joke.)
Why can’t orphans have sex, my friends? Why? They have none to call daddy.
She said she was hungry. So I fucked her in the ass and gave her a chili dog.
Why can't orphans have sex?
Because they have no one to call "daddy."
Friends are very important. I have lots of friends in very high places. I hope the police can talk them down!
I turned the light on, and my dad said turn it off, so I unplugged his life support.
Said the man angered to his wife:
"Now stop the damn suicide tries! Just look at the gas bill!?"
The reason I'm gay is because I'm scared of getting cooties.