Relationship jokes
Me: Are you an orphan?
Orphan: Yes, what gave me away?
Me: Your parents.
Your entire family tree must be a cactus, because everyone in your family is such a prick.
You're gay.
Bro, I am straighter than the pole that your mom dances on for me every night.
Tell world's best yo mama joke to an orphan, then watch them cry.
"I’m on a hunt for my wife’s murderer, have been for years."
"Oh my God! Your wife’s been murdered?!"
"No no, you misunderstand. I’m still looking for him."
Why can't orphans be gay?
Because they have no one to call "daddy."
Q: What happens when emos make out?
A: They don't; they just hang out.
Today was the worst day ever. My ex got ran over by a bus, and I lost my job as a bus driver.
Why go across town when you can go across the hall?
If you have a girlfriend/crush that's shorter than you, go up to her and say, "You're short, lemme add some inches."
Q: What did the cannibal do after he dumped his girlfriend?
A: He wiped his ass.
A man is digging in his garden and finds a gold chest. He goes to tell his wife.
Then he remembers why he was digging in the garden...
My parents raised me as an only child, which really pissed off my sister.
My girlfriend's dog died, so to cheer her up I went out and got her an identical one.
She went mad, "What am I going to do with two dead dogs?"
I fell in love with my computer because it helps me Excel.
Why do orphans love chips?
Because they're all family sized.
Why do orphans hate Dom Toretto?
Because they hate how he cares about family.
Why can’t an orphan be gay?
Because they have no one to call “daddy.”
What did the orphan's parent say when he got bad grades?
Nothing, he doesn't have any.
F in orphan means family.