Relationship

Relationship jokes

A doctor walks into the room and tells his patient, "I have some bad news for you. You really have to stop masturbating."

The man looks aghast and says, "Oh my God, doc, why?!"

The doctor replies, "I'm trying to examine you."

Who am I rooting for during the Super Bowl? Easy. Taylor Swift.

What’s the difference between the baby I just stabbed and Isaac Newton?

Isaac Newton died a virgin.

My girlfriend went to Tokyo, and she died in the tsunami.

Since I was sad, my friend told me, "Don't worry, there's plenty more in the ocean."

Feeling stressed? Have a nice cup of tea and spill it in the lab of the person bothering you.

My husband is mad that I have no sense of direction, so I packed up my stuff and left. Right?

Yo mama is such a slut, she could get slapped by a pack of hot dogs and get pregnant.

Random couple after their first night:

Husband: It was very tasty. 🥵

Wife: Aww, thanks.

Husband: Does anyone had taste it before?

Wife: ☠️

I told my dad that I wanted to go to a college with a 100% acceptance rate and a 50% graduation rate, and he said, "Your mom doesn't count as a college!"

May our days be abundant, a dance of delight, May I navigate life with courage, taking flight. May our journey be a beauty, a blessing so sweet, May I celebrate friendships, where hearts and souls meet.

May our nights be bright, with laughter and cheer, May we live with love, eliminating every fear. May I grow in kindness, a serenade of grace, May our lives be a marvel, a splendid embrace.

I walked in on my little sister when she was naked.

The thing I have to say is that my little sister is a big sister with big tits & ass with juicy lips upstairs & downstairs. I say whoever is going to be my brother-in-law is going to be a very happy person.

What’s the difference between erotic and kinky?

Erotic is usually a feather. Kinky is using the whole chicken.

Why are gay men better than straight women?

Because gay men are more willing to look after kids once they swallow them.