Relationship jokes
My wife left a note on the fridge. The note read, "It's not working." I don't know what she's talking about. I opened the fridge, and it worked fine!
I'm really bored. Can someone talk with me? None of my friends are responding to me :(
What do you call a gay man that performs fellatio on a man and cunnilingus on a woman, a person who is curious about male bisexuality, a man that is bicurious?
Does it cycle now?
What did me and my uncle call hide and seek? Naked and afraid.
You can pick your friends and you can pick your š¤„ nose, but you can't pick your friends' noses š š š š š š š.
Does it š² š² š² cycle now?
Why did Zayn Malik get his girlfriend to convert to Islam? So she can declare GiGIHADid.
Why do gay men want to eat each other's meat because meat is meat, and man has to eat meat?
What do gay men like to suck each other's bananas because they like the ice cream filling?
Congratulations! 10 years+ record of hide and seek with your parents, and they're still hiding!
They hide so well, they probably forgot about you. Mwah. <3
Penis ā ā ā š³
inside š¹ š¹ restroom
equals š š š š inside
glory š³
My wife accused me of being immature, so I kicked her out of my "boys fort."
Gwen, are you dead????? If not, I am Alya. Thanks for always standing up for me!!!!!!!!!!!
To Gwen and Freshfry: Hi Gwen and Freshfry, you have been so amazing to me and now to my sister. You are the people who I look up to. People are mean to us because I am adopted. Thank you for all of your support!
I took my brother's vape, and now he is on the ground gasping for air. He acts like he is dying.
Me: What's that sound?
Ex: What?
Me: Oh, it's the elevator going up. BYEEEE see you on another level!
What is the difference between you and me? I have parents and yours left...
During school today, a girl gave my friend her number. When I saw it, it was the principal's number.
Why did the chicken cross the road?
IDK! WHY?
To go see yo mama!
I can't help myself I put it down on paper All the different stages, memories of us That's the only way I know that I can shake it Writing all our pages, every single thought I know you don't like when I'm nostalgic No, you've never tried to understand Say you're doing fine, don't think about it Like I do.
Sorry for writing all the songs about you I know that you hate that I got more to say Sorry for writing all the songs about you But I had to, oh, I had to Swear no one will know that every moment was true All the mistakes and why I ran away Sorry for writing all the songs about you But I had to, oh, I had to
I can't wait for you to recognize the stories Like when you said i was beautiful Will you act as if you haven't even heard it? Nothing of it really matters 'Cause I know you don't like when I'm nostalgic Go back to the start to get an end Say you're doing fine, don't think about it Like I do.
Sorry for writing all the songs about you I know that you hate that I got more to say Sorry for writing all the songs about you But I had to, oh, I had to Swear no one will know that every moment was true All the mistakes and why I ran away Sorry for writing all the songs about you But I had to, oh, I had to
Just to get over what we lost, what we lost I put it in words to clear my thoughts And just to get over, over us I had to, I had to
Sorry for writing all the songs about you I know that you hate that I got more to say Sorry for writing all the songs about you But I had to, oh, I had to Swear no one will know that every moment was true All the mistakes and why I ran away Sorry for writing all the songs about you But I had to, oh, I had to
sorry kenny?!
Me: I have the body of a 28 year old.
Her: Prove it.
Me: (opens freezer)