Relationship jokes
What’s a 5 letter word that starts with a ‘P’ that girls love to get their hands on? 😏
I love pussy.
A rich man and a poor man are talking about anniversaries. The rich man got his wife a Mercedes and a diamond ring. He says if the wife does not like the ring, she can take the Mercedes and leave.
The poor man said he got his wife slippers and a dildo. He says if his wife does not like the slippers, she can go and fuck herself.
I'm 14. I have had sex before. I have 206 bones in my body, but when I'm with my gf, I have 207.
Why do you call a priest a father? Because calling them daddy would be too sus.
Jack and Jill went up the hill to get a bucket of water.
Jack slipped, his condom ripped, and now they have a daughter.
You smash me so hard, I gave her the D.
If you make a joke about me, I'll tell my mom.
We all know yo homie bout to hop in a fight when:
1. He staring mighty hard at y'all.
2. When your friend know you gon get your ass beat.
3. When your friend say he not gon jump in (you know he lying).
I went to visit my childhood home. I asked the owners if I could come in for some nostalgic memories. They said no and slammed the door on me. My parents are so mean.
When I see two lovers' names on a tree, I don’t find it cute or funny. I think, why would they be bringing a knife on a date?
Yo momma so fat that it was hard to find the G spot and slip her one at night.
Your hairline bent like the relationship with your mom and dad.
What do women and screen doors have in common? The more you bang them, the looser they get.
I got a pen for my baby sister. Best trade I made so far.
Why don't emo girls date emo boys? Cause they've already got a pussy.
When does a joke become a dad joke? When it leaves you and never comes back.
When I see the names of lovers engraved on a tree, I don't find it cute or romantic. I find it weird how many people take knives with them on outings.
Listen, my brothers, if you see a photo of her with another person,
Just go to her house and shoot her with your AK47.
Why do orphans cry alone?
They do not have a mom's lap to sit on and a shoulder to cry on.