Red jokes

I dipped my hand in red food dye, so I said, "Looks like I’ve been caught red-handed!"

What is small, red, and sitting in the corner?

A baby playing with a scalpel.

Why do elephants paint their toes red, blue, green, orange, brown, and yellow?

So they can hide in a bag of M&Ms.

Roses are red, don’t touch the toys, these are what the priests use to lure in the boys.

Blood is red.

Bruises are blue. I forget the rest... um, I hate you...?

Red hot 🥵

Roses are red. Walls are made of plaster. Schoolchildren can move fast, But bullets can move faster.

Roses are red.

My soul is black.

I am never getting my dad back.

Roses are red, violets are blue, she is hot, but you're as ugly as poo.

My version of the Roses are Red Poem in MW3:

I thought Soap could trust you. And so did I too. So WHY IN BLOODY HELL DOES MAKAROV KNOW YOU?!

Roses are blood red, violets are twilight-hued; your blood was delectable, and so was the rest of you.

Roses are blood red, violets are twilight-hued oh how I wish I was dead so that I no longer have to brood.

Death would be a reprieve as I would no longer have to be true, and I would no longer have to be around any of you.

Roses are red, I like girls from the South, a 425-pound teacher gets suspended after sitting on a kid's head and farting in his mouth.

If you are talking to an Indian and notice a red dot appear on their forehead, be careful of what you said... They are recording it down... Careful... (no offense) pure joke.

Why did the Red Sox lose?

They say, "Boo, Colorado Rockies."

Roses are red, violets are not, everyone at Grant High School is probably a thot.

What has 2 legs and is red all over?

Roses are red, violets are black, I traded my son for 10 Big Macs.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, How many bananas can I fit, Maybe two?

Roses are red.

Roses are red.

Roses are red.

I smell burnt toast.