Red jokes
A redhead, a dark-haired woman, and a blonde walk into a bar and agree to fly to the sun!
The blonde states, "I agree, let's leave at night!"
My cat is red and brown and her bones are crunchy, so does that mean she is a Kit Kat?
Roses are not always red, Violets are violet, not blue. Irises are never red, Petunias can be kinda blue.
What does this tell us 'cept you can't trust a poet to tell the truth.
What is Green and Red and goes round and round?
A frog in a blender.
(this next one is pretty bad, and I don't mean it, so don't get offended)
What's the difference between a Mexican and a park bench?
One can support an average family.
Roses are red, violets are blue, I don't know why I am still alive for you.
What’s red and goes 100 miles per hour?
Babies in a blender.
Roses are red. Violets are blue. If he's busy on Valentine's Day, the side chick is you.
What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick.
Roses are red, violets are blue, My heart is dead, I’m such a fool.
Roses are red, my blood is too. I see a lot when I lost you.
Roses are red, violets are blue, Cause comes near my Willy.
What’s red and bad for your dental health? A brick.
What’s invisible and bad for you to breathe? Mustard gas.
What’s green and bad for you to drink? Radioactive waste.
What's black, white, and red all over?
Lossvagus school shooting.
What's red, takes my belt, and what I got from a weird children's house?
An orphan.
Leprechauns are stupid. No joke.
Are you a toaster?
Roses are red, violets are blue, Fortnite is dead, so are you.
(I have no friends because all of my friends play Fortgay, just like my friends all of them are gay.)
A guy was on trial for murder, and if convicted, would get the electric chair. His brother found out that a redneck was on the jury and figured he would be the one to bribe. He told the redneck that he would be paid $10,000 if he could convince the rest of the jury to reduce the charge to manslaughter.
The jury was out an entire week and returned with a verdict of manslaughter.
After the trial, the brother went to the redneck's house, told him what a great job he had done, and paid him the $10,000.
The redneck replied that it wasn't easy to convince the rest of the jury to change the charge to manslaughter. They all thought he was not guilty and wanted to let him go.
Roses are red.
Violets are blue.
Once I'm done choking you,
You will be too.
Q: Why did the elephant paint his toenails red?
A: To hide up cherry trees.
Q: What's the loudest noise in the jungle?
A: Giraffes eating cherries.
Roses are red, Your blood is too. You look like a monkey and belong in a zoo.
Do not worry, I will be there too, Not in a cage but laughing at you!