What do you say to your pet when your super tired, slow, and worn out?

I'm totally dogging it today...

If chickens wake up when the Rooster crows, then when do ducks wake?

At the quack of dawn.

Doctor: You need new glasses.

Patient: How'd you know? I haven't even told you what is wrong with me yet.

Doctor: I could tell as soon as you walked in through the window.

What do you call a short fortune-teller that escaped from jail?

A Small Medium at Large.