Puns
What do you call a group of emo people?
"The Suicide Squad."
What did the cucumber say to the bell pepper that wasn't wearing enough clothes?
You need more dressing.
What did momma seal name her twin girls?
Luceal and Sealia.
The flower made a phone call and became cauliflower.
Gaston gets the no-Belle prize! :D
All trucks are monster trucks if you’re afraid of trucks.
They say nothing is impossible, but I've been doing nothing all day.
What do you call someone who used to kill people? An ex-executioner.
Why was the Koala Bear so clever?
Because he had good koalifications!
To master puns, you got to relish them first. That's how I must(ar)d it. Who knows, maybe you will ketchup to my level.
As a hobby, I started taking walks around the old clock tower.
It's a great way to pass the time.
What is a vampire’s favorite fruit?
A nectarine.
What's the difference between tuna, a piano and glue?
You can tuna piano, but you can't piano a tuna.
How can you tell if an ant is a boy or a girl?
If it sinks it’s a girl. If it floats, it’s boy-ant (buoyant).
I was gonna tell a rumor about butter, but I don’t want to spread it.
Oofer.
Why did the crumb cake isolate himself? He had a crumbling social life.
The grapes in the supermarket are really raisin' the bars...
Hitler was a dic-tator.
What did the Arch bridge say to the Truss bridge?
"I Truss-ted you!"