Puns

What did the janitor say when he jumped out of the closet?

"SUPPLIES!"

Boss: How good are you at PowerPoint?

Me: I Excel at it.

Boss: Was that a Microsoft pun?

Me: Word.

What did Batman say to Robin before getting in the Batmobile?

"Get in the Batmobile!"

Buh dum tish.

Where did the one legged lady work?

IHOP

I'm listening to a song about fish--it's very catchy.

You know, most people take rocks for granite... sorry.

Hey, look, it's Bai! (insert the picture of a Bai drink)

I was cooking eggs the other day. It was very egg-citing, although, I was exaggerating, but, if you think that wasn’t funny to you, then you’re hard-boiled. That’s all for today, yolks! So I said before several cats starting fighting, that sh*t was a catastrophe. These kittens were all like “You’ve gotta be kitten me.” Meanwhile, in the ocean, they just waved, see what I did there? You shore you didn’t? Oh, alright, that’s okay bud- I guess these ocean puns are too deep for you. No? Okay- but, you know why the skeleton was lonely, eh? Oh, cause he had no body. Why didn’t the skeleton ask the girl out? He didn’t have the guts. What did the skeleton do to his gf? He boned her. No? Alright. Those didn’t make you laugh? Maybe I should hit your funny bone.

When my friend eats a mint, I say, "Hey, is it mint to be sweet?"

What did the spaghetti say to the sauce? Pasta la vista!

Why does Trump build a wall?

There’s such a thing as a ladder.

What is the cheapest kind of meat?

Deer balls, two for under a buck!

If you try to fail and you succeed, which one did you do?

Everything is made in China, except babies... They are made in Vachina.

So, there was this cop on the top bunk of a bunk bed.

Another cop walks in and sits on the bottom bunk and the cop on the top bunk bed said, "You're under a-rest."

My brother puts his butt in his face and says, "Kyle, you're cracking me up!"

I forgot my lucky egg! It always gives me an eggcellent amount of luck!

A pun walked into a room and killed ten people.

Pun in, ten dead.

What kind of clothing should you wear on “hump day”? Camelflouge.

What do you call it when tectonic plates start racing?

Continental Drift.