Communist jokes aren’t funny unless everyone gets them.

What do you call an alligator with a vest?

An investigator.

What happens when a clock is hungry It goes back four seconds.

I used to be a banker but I lost interest…

Why was Cinderella thrown off the basketball team? She always ran away from the ball.

Why can’t bikes stand? Because they are two tired (Too tired)

Where did the cat go when it lost it’s tail? – To the retail store!

What do you say to your sister when she’s crying? – “Are you having a crisis?”

How does a fish always know how much they weigh? – Because they have their own scales.

There was a wedding so sad that even the cake was in tiers.

Hear about the restaurant called karma? There is no menu: You get what you deserve

I told the doctor I didn’t want a brain surgery. But he changed my mind.

Two men walk into a bar you’d think the second one would’ve seen it

Why do bees have sticky hair

They always use honeycombs

I almost secretly married a watermelon, but I canteloupe.

My poor knowledge of Greek mythology has always been my Achilles’ elbow.

Did you hear about the man who was accidentally buried alive? – It was a grave mistake.

I went to a seafood disco last week…and pulled a mussel.

I never wanted to believe that my Dad was stealing from his job as a road worker.

But when I got home, all the signs were there.

I would tell you a construction pun, but I’m still working on it

You want to hear some marriage jokes?

Don’t worry it’s just a couple.

New Teslas don’t come with a new car smell they come with an Elon Musk