Puns
What does a 911 call receiver say when they get a call?
"9 Juan Juan, who this?"
During the holidays in the fruit bowl, the orange walked up to the banana and said, "Berry Christmas!"
Why was the beach salty? Because the land didn't wave back. The ocean then called the land a beach.
If you thought other people’s puns are bad, well, you should sea mine.
What did the man say when he knocked down the bookshelf?
Looks like I've only got myself to blame...
Why did the pony have to gargle? Maybe because he was feeling a little hoarse.
How do you call a cop?
Through the phone.
(My puns are bad)
Have you ever eaten a clock before? I heard it’s very time consuming.
Why did the roach talk to the man? To die.
A guy walks up to me in the street and asks if you have to include the name of an animal in every sentence. I said only if it's relephant.
He says what about vegetables. I said not nesecelery.
I was watching a TV show where a guy was hanging off a cliff, then the series ended... I guess you can say that they left that guy on a cliffhanger!
I was at a football match, and the ball was getting closer. Then it hit me. *face palm*
Asshole.
I didn’t know what a class clown was till I went to a class and realized I was a class clown in kindergarten, and then I woke up from a nightmare.
"Have you ever heard of the snail that never gives charity?"
"Yeah, he is so shellfish!"
Video game company names always make me make puns I didn't intend to.
What did the explorer say when he got tired?
I'm gonna take a map.
Diarrhea.
Why is a sweet potato casserole so sweet? Because it's so sweet to eat!
Yeah, not too bad at all, really.