A person could build a playground with your mood swings.
If an emo kid jumps off a building, who would win?
Society.
What do you call a depressed person's life?
At this point, nonexistent.
Why do orphans hate Ted Bundy? Cause he's the most wanted.
Depressed procrastinators feel like they wanna kill themselves sometime soon.
What do you call an orphan in a room full of mirrors? Surrounded by loved ones.
Why did the hooker fall in love? Stockholm syndrome.
What did the suicidal guy say to his audience?
What did the suicidal guy say to his audience?
How do you get a depressed person out of a tree?
You cut the rope.
Principal: “Why did you have to skip class? Because of that detention!”
Kid: “Whatever!”
Principal: “Why did you have to swear? Because of that one demerit!”
Kid: “Doesn't matter!”
Principal: “Why did you yell at a teacher and throw a chair at them? Because of that you're suspended!”
Kid: “Oh well!”
Principal: “Why did you have to push a kid down the stairs and kill them? Because of that you're expelled!”
Kid: “I'm trying not to kill myself!”
Serial killers be like: "Blood is red, veins are blue, next one is YOU."
What lies at the bottom of the ocean and twitches?
A nervous wreck.
What did the emo say before he crossed the road?
"Fuck my life."
Are you the voices I've been hearing?
Because I can't seem to get you out of my head. (Schizophrenic RIZZ)
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Crippling depression.
Crippling depression who--?
Me.
I always sucked at mazes. I found myself lost over and over again, but if life is a labyrinth, I'd always find the escape. The final dead end, my personal favorite...
How do you lift a depressed person up?
No need, they'll find a way to get on the tree somehow.
This is why orphans are dangerous with cardboard. They either start eating it or making it into a house and hallucinating that they have a family.
So I threw out the cardboard and said, "You have to stay in reality. Fantasies aren't real. You can't and will never get a home."
Next day, they make cardboard parents, so I threw that away and said, "Pay attention to reality; you will never get parents."
Next day, they start acting like parents and tell me what to do. Again, I said, "Snap to reality. You will never be a parent!" The orphan responded with, "Oh, really?! How so?" I just simply said, "You don't have a house and parents. You literally like eating cardboard, and then you make parents out of it. You like to eat old people!"
When you see an orphanage bully, remind them that no matter how powerful they are, they will never be as strong as their dads... Oh wait, they don't have a dad.
Why can orphans travel around so much?
A. They never get homesick.
