Psychology jokes
Pooooooooooooooooooooooooooo.
Whenever I’m bored, I hit up my local orphanage and beat some of them up.
I mean honestly, what are they going to do, tell their parents? 😂😂
Suicide: Turning one's biology into complex organic chemistry.
Why did the orphan commit a crime?
Because they wanted to be wanted!
The cure for depression is around the corner... There it is, the train.
Now that's the piece I'm missing!
When you see an orphanage bully, remind them that no matter how powerful they are, they will never be as strong as their dads... Oh wait, they don't have a dad.
To anyone suffering from low self esteem:
https://www.youtube.com/shorts/UTymDoPOEnY
The 6th-grade science teacher, Mrs. Parks, asked her class, “Which human body part increases to ten times its size when stimulated?”
No one answered until little Mary stood up and said, “You should not be asking sixth-graders a question like that! I’m going to tell my parents, and they will go and tell the principal, who will then fire you!”
Mrs. Parks ignored her and asked the question again, “Which body part increases to 10 times its size when stimulated?”
Little Mary’s mouth fell open. Then she said to those around her, “Boy, is she going to get in big trouble!”
The teacher continued to ignore her and said to the class, “Anybody?”
Finally, Billy stood up, looked around nervously, and said, “The body part that increases 10 times its size when stimulated is the pupil of the eye.”
Mrs. Parks said, “Very good, Billy,” then turned to Mary and continued.
“As for you, young lady, I have three things to say: One, you have a dirty mind. Two, you didn’t read your homework. And three, one day you are going to be very, very disappointed.”
Why don't molestation victims speak up about their trauma? Because it's a touchy topic.
There were once these two twins. One twin, no matter what happened, was always pissed off, while the other one was always happy.
This baffled scientists, so they ran an experiment on the twins to figure out what was happening. They took the angry one and left him in a room with all of the latest technology and the most expensive toys and left him overnight. When they came back, he was still grumpy. When they asked him why, he said, "None of these are actually mine, and you left me in here all night, so I'm angry!"
His explanation was reasonable, so they ran another experiment on the other kid. This time, they left him overnight in a room that was literally just filled with horse shit. When they came back to check on him the next morning, he was still smiling. When they asked him why, he said, "With all of this horse crap, there has to be a pony in here somewhere!"
People complain we are overpopulated.
Well, then if we committed suicide, then why do they be sad? It's one less person to think about. Why complain about it when in the end we become sad people?
I'm going to start taking confetti with me to therapy so when my therapist asks me, "How are you?" I can say "sad" and toss the confetti everywhere. It'll be like a real-life iMessage!
Why do orphans like pedos? Because it's someone that loves them and they can call "daddy."
What do orgasms and impulses have in common?
I don’t care if they have either of them.
Why do orphans want to be criminals? Because they want to feel what it’s like to be wanted.
My grief counselor died. He was so good, I didn't even care.
Why are orphans very abusive to their kids?
Because they never had loving parents of their own.
What do you call an obese man with bipolar? Twins.
I'd tell a child abuse joke, but I forget the punchline.
What’s a depressed kid’s favorite game? Hangman.