How do you call Doom guy that drinks Monster Zero? Boom guy!
I was ridin' your mom like she was Mario Kart!
Mom: You can't die in the living room, David, so you can stop stabbing and shooting yourself.
David: I will surpass Kakarot!
Jordan: *dead on the living room floor*
What's the difference between an orphan and Daniel Larusso?
At least Daniel has a mom.
Do emos get jealous when their phone dies?
There were three women, one was curvy in all the right places, one was skinny but had a booty on her, and last but not least there’s one that has a BBL. Then comes in a famous rapper, guess which one he picked???
Every Cobra Kai joke that was made, it's just me.
Q: What did Darth Vader say to his smashed wristwatch?
A: I find your lack of face disturbing.
Me: No one likes Shrek; he is just a fat green guy.
Friend: Hey! Stop talking about me.
"Out of the way, I need to Caterpie."
In the words of Kerk Cobane: "Check this sweet no scope!"
What do you get if you cross Damian Lillard and a watch?
omae wa mou shindeiru.
Nani?
Angelina Jolie was married to Brad Pitt...
Does that make her a "Brad Nailer", and him a "Jolie Jumper"?
How do you know Thor has your back?
He's an Asgardian (ass guardian).
What’s the best Marvel villain song EVER?
It Was Agatha All Along!!! *gasp* And I killed Sparky, too. *laughs manically*
What's Michael Jackson's favorite hobby?
Nothing because he's dead.
Why you never have to give a balloon to Elsa?
Because she will let it goooooooooooooooo let it goooo!
Say my name if you like "Breaking Bad."
Your mama so fat that when Thanos snapped his finger, it only got rid of weight.
