Politics jokes
By the way, why are there no knock knock jokes about America?
Because freedom rings, but they never answer that door.
Enjoy!
Why is Biden a priest?
So kids call him father.
Putin be like that boat is now a submarine!
A 17 year old pregnant Juanita flew all the way to NY from TX to get an abortion. Initially, she was denied the procedure because she wasn't COVID boosted, but after she explained the father was religious and wanted to be involved, they quickly resolved the threat.
Who are cats going to vote for in November? Hillary Kitten.
How many communists does it take to change a lightbulb? Never enough.
When your gf tells you to treat her like a queen,
and then you remember you’re French.
Trump plays Fortnite for walls.
He plays Fortnite just to build walls.
What's the best thing about Switzerland?
I don't know, but the flag is a big plus.
Yo mama is so classless, she could be a Marxist utopia.
Why did Obama marry Michelle?
Because he's into chicks with dicks.
I think we should change Alzheimer’s disease to Joe Biden disease.
I'm offended.
- Liberals
Why should a feminist never be allowed to join the UAW United Auto Workers?
Because the only thing that a feminist will do in the UAW United Auto Workers, is eat pussy all day inside the women's restroom and she will only pay her membership dues, if she is allowed to eat pussy all day inside the women's restroom.
What is black and white?
Probably Mexican history.
In 1941, Hans, a young German boy, was listening to the radio.
Over the radio, Hitler announced that Germany was now going to war with the United States.
"Father, where is the United States?" Hans asked.
His father pointed at a map of North America.
"Aren’t we currently at war with Russia? Where might that be?" he questioned his father.
The man pointed towards the Soviet Union.
"And I’m told we’re also at war with the British Empire. Where is that?"
The father pointed out all of the territories owned by the British.
"Where is Germany again, Father?"
He pointed to their home country in Central Europe.
Hans pondered this information for a second. "One last question, Father."
"Yes?"
"Has Hitler seen this map?"
When Trump goes to the beach, he doesn't use suntan lotion. He uses Dorito dust, and it stays on for the rest of his life.
Donald Trump travels back in time to talk to his 10-year-old self.
When he sees himself, he says, "Do you see me? I am you, but almost 70 years older."
His 10-year-old self asks him, "Am I going to be famous?"
Trump replies, "Oh yeah, I became president of the United States. Not once. Twice!"
10-year-old Donald was shocked. But he became even more shocked when he heard the next sentence from his current self: "And now take off your pants!"
What do you call the Christian version of Donald Trump? Holy shit!