Politics jokes

What do you call the most fucking racist and obnoxious country in the fucking entire fucking omniverse? NORTH AMERICA!

And if you disagree just 'cus you're American, I don't give a fuck, you low life cunts. Plus, if you don't think you're racist, um, hello people? Motherfucking George Floyd!

Pierre Poilievre has lost the government position he had for 20 years.

Bet he wishes his mom HAD used that coat hanger.

Q. What's the Premier of Alberta's favorite sex toy? A. I don't know, but I wish it were me.

Why is the USA so bad at chess?

Because they already lost the Twin Towers.

Why do they call Melania Trump the "Walk-In Freezer"?

Answer: Because it's where EVERYONE GOES to "Hang Their Meat!"

What do you call an Israeli strike against Gaza?

A Kike Strike!

What’s the difference between a fetus and a woman?

A fetus has more rights.

Why did the Twin Towers fall exactly at 9/11?

Because the terrorists thought that it would be fun to call 911 as a "prank."

Someone asked the former 2016 presidential candidate Hillary Clinton why she lost the 2016 presidential election to Donald John Trump, and the former 2016 presidential candidate Hillary Clinton said, "Because someone asked her what she would do for a Klondike Bar?"

What's the difference between George Floyd and Joe Biden?

They both talk like they're on fent.

What's Osama bin Laden's favorite song?

"Under the Sea," from The Little Mermaid.

And together we will make America great again.

You were never great in the first place.

I heard China aborts 25% of female babies. That's a lot of dead 3-year-old gender-affirmed girls.

What do you call a kid that’s cold and his name is war?

Cold War.

Roses are red, violets are blue, Mike Pence's hair is made of glue.

Why did UK want Northern Ireland for more s***?

You are so fat you were able to occupy Wall Street all by yourself.

Why did Russia put war on Ukraine for more nuts?

Why did the French call Napoleon "Napo?" Because it is Napo[leon].

What's worse than having a comedian as president? Having a president that has dementia.