Politics jokes
My sister is so stupid, she thought LBJ was a blow job.
Bill Clinton is no longer playing the saxophone.
He is now playing the whore-monica.
Guys, I know how to stop racism. Delete the word "racism." People can't be something that doesn't exist.
We used to have Reagan, Jonny Cash, and Bob Hope. Now we have Biden, no cash, and no hope.
How Chinese is COVID? About the same as those red MAGA hats made in China.
If Mexico is an unredeemable shithole, then how come the Republicans' favorite senator, Ted Cruz, ran to Mexico as fast as he could after a little bit of snow in his home?
Why does Donald Trump have a fervent crush on the Russian president?
He is Putin his dick where it don't belong!
What was Hitler's favorite thing to do to pass the time?
Smoking.
What's the difference between a Nazi and an onion? If you cut a Nazi, nobody is crying.
Who is the most horny and fat ass god?
Kim Jung Un.
Why can't England play chess?
Because they have no queen, and they will soon lose their king.
What’s one thing Obama proved during his presidency?
No matter how far a brotha gets in life, he’s still going to have the cops on his back.
What is the difference between an Isis training camp and a school?
Not sure, I just fly the drone.
What do you call an orange on a small stick?
Donald Trump.
Donald Trump is proud of being white, which is strange, considering he's orange. Makes you wonder why he didn't pull a Michael Jackson and bleach his own skin....
JFK and Abe Lincoln were some of the most open-minded presidents ever.
If the UK is 6 hours ahead of us, why didn't they just warn us about 9/11?
What’s the difference between a feminist and a suicidal vest?
A suicidal vest actually works when triggered.
Cheap oil, no immigration, and no school shootings.
Corona did what Trump promised.
In order to get $355 million for his civil fraud case, Donald Trump desperately needed to fundraise. So, in every Republican Party event, he will serve the Patriotic Trump Dog! It consists of an 80-year-old sausage inside a 10-year-old cream bun, topped with Russian dressing.
Trump does have the best people, doesn't he?