Play jokes

Your mom is so fat, she played bowling with the planets.

The orphan can’t play soccer because he doesn’t know where home is, and his school is too dumb to learn.

What’s a booty’s favorite game?

Hide and cheek.

Why can’t orphans play catch?

They never had a dad to teach them.

What game did Al-Qaeda play with the Twin Towers on September 11th, 2001? Jenga.

Sometimes, you've got to specifically go out of your way to get into trouble. It's called fun.

My girlfriend told me to stop playing Pokemon as it was childish.

I started thrashing about and roared, “You don’t have enough badges to control me!”

I played piano at a Worthmore disabled elderly center. Then after I was done, I said, "How about you give me a standing ovation?"

I regret it to this day. Now I am forced to live here at Worthmore, and sit on my wheelchair, sad and lonely.

A man is sitting on a bench at a playground where children are playing. A man named Chris comes up and asks, “Which one is yours?” The man said, “I don’t know, I’m still deciding.”

I was playing hangman, and I gave up on the word "LIFE".

I told the emo girl to stop playing fruit ninja on her wrists.

I played Uno with my Mexican friend.

That bastard took all the green cards!

Beethoven to Chris Doemges: "What instrument do you play outside in the Arctic at -12 degrees Celsius?"

Doemges: "Probably the shiver..."

Why did Shakespeare only write using quills?

Pencils confused him: 2b or not 2b.

Little Johnny was playing with his train and said, "All you motherf*ckers who want to get off, get off, and all you motherf*ckers who want to get on, get on." His mother hears him and asks, "Is that you cussing?" The mother said, "Go to your room for 1 hour." Little Johnny goes to his room, then comes back one hour later and said, "All you motherf*ckers who wanna get off, get off, and all you motherf*ckers who wanna get on, get on, and if you wanna know about the 1 hour delay, go ask the b*tch in the kitchen."

Why do orphans love role-plays?

Because they can call someone "daddy."

What did they do with his body when he died?

They made him into Lego so kids can play with him for once.

As siblings, we always joke about being adopted. It stops being funny when you're playing in your parents' room and find both of your adoption papers. : )

I was playing football with my friends, and I got tackled and got a penalty. Suddenly, the ground started shaking, and Penaldo emerged from the mud. He took the penalty, but since it wasn't Andorra, he missed. Shame on you, Penaldo!

Why do orphans play GTA?

To be wanted.

Why do orphanages give out free phones?

So you can press the home button.