Plant jokes
What’s the hardest part of a vegetable? The wheelchair.
"Tibia" honestly, I think the reason I’m "bonely" is because you guys don’t find my jokes "humerus."
Maybe if I played the trombone it would get people’s attention, but "tibia" honest I can’t be bothered, so just look at my "BONE-zai" tree, although my brother doesn’t really like that one, so how about a "S-pine" tree?
How did the security guard at the orchid get better at his job? He got an Apple Watch.
What do you call a sad strawberry?
A blueberry.
What kind of tree fits into your hand? A palm tree.
Why are trees afraid of dogs? Because they bark.
What flowers are on your face?
Vegetarian: I prefer plants.
Herbivore: I just like food.
Cannibal: I'm a people person.
Why did the boy put a chicken 🐔 in his garden?
He wanted to grow an eggplant. 😂
Alright, I'm gonna make like a tree and leaf.
*****You have to leave right after you tell this joke.****
My depressed mom looks good hanging from a tree.
You wanna know what I have in common with an apple?
We BOTH look good hanging in a tree.
What is the difference between a human and a tree?
And walk, walk home, and...
Why did the orange fall off the tree? Because he went out on a limb.
What do you call a tree?
What did the tree say to his sister? Wood you please leaf me alone, you son of a birch?
If my cat were a cactus, doesn't that make him the catus?
What's big, round, and can't move?
A vegetable!
Where were the first orange trees 🍊🌳 planted?
In Orange County.
What is the difference between a car and a tree?
A tree cannot drive, but a car can drive.