Plant jokes
What's big, round, and can't move?
A vegetable!
Where were the first orange trees 🍊🌳 planted?
In Orange County.
What is the difference between a car and a tree?
A tree cannot drive, but a car can drive.
What did one nut say to the other nut? "Help!"
What is one of the worst but funniest incidents ever: a bullet in a baby in a baggy in a barrel in a bus in a nuclear plant were all of the employee's are molesters?
When you're sitting by the mushrooms and you hear one say to the other "Hey, you're a fun guy."
Why did the beans fuck the mum to make bouncing beans?
9 people walked into Bunnings Warehouse.
2 people bought plants.
3 people bought shovels.
1 person yelled.
3 people left Bunnings Warehouse.
1 person was me. I guess those three people are fired! 💁♀️🤦♀️
What was the oak tree's response to the apple tree's joke?
You should leaf it alone!
Do you like tree jokes? Because they leaf me in tears!
Do you like tree jokes? Because they leaf me in tears! :3
What did one bean say to the other bean?
How you bean?
My brother can't wait for spring... he wet his plants!
Mom: Go water the plants.
Me: But it’s raining outside.
Mom: Go grab the umbrella.
Me: What???
Why did Karen leave me?
Because I was a mushroom.
What's worse than ten babies stapled to a tree?
A baby stapled to ten trees.
Why couldn't the carrot go to his friend's house?
Because he was grounded.
What does a baby banana call her mum? Na na, get it? Instead of ma ma.
Why do people want emo grass? Because it'll cut itself.
I talked to a future suicide bomber. I told him, "ISIS ain't got sh** on me because I planted a bomb and lived."