Pirate jokes
What did the ocean say to the pirate? Nothing, it just waved.
Are you a pirate? Because I have a lot of seamen waiting for you 😉
Why did the pirate kids ride the short bus to school?
Because they were retarrrrrrrrrded.
Why is the rum gone?
What’s a bird’s favorite movie?
The Parrots of the Caribbean.
When I was a child, I was made to walk the plank... We couldn't afford a dog.
Why does it take so long for the pirates to learn the alphabet?
Because they spend years on C! Pirate: A, B, sea?
What does every pirate hate?
A small chest with no booty.
"Not all treasure is silver and gold, mate."
A pirate walks into a bar and has a ship's wheel in his pants.
The bartender asks, "What's with the wheel in your pants?"
The pirate replies, "Yarrr! It's drivin' me nuts!"
A pirate walks into a bar with a steering wheel on his pants, a peg leg, and a parrot on his shoulder. The bartender says, "Hey, you’ve got a steering wheel on your pants."
The pirate says, "Arrrr, I know. It’s driving me nuts."
What do you call a lesbian pirate?
Red Beard.
Why was it so hard for the pirate to call his mom? Because she left the phone off the hook!
I've got a jar of dirt! I've got a jar of dirt, and guess what's inside it!
Bertold Brecht & Tork Poettschke visit the places of their youth together. One says to the other: "Here used to be the Phoenix Lake. Where did he go?" "That was probably a pirate ..."
Why do rappers make terrible pirates?
Because they’re always DROPPING HOOKS!
Why did Stephen Hawking die?
He pirated GTA VI Hindi No Virus 2022.
How did Capetian Hook kill himself? He wiped his butt with the wrong hand.
One does not simply hand over a jar of dirt.
"Jack Sparrow."
"Captain, Captain Jack Sparrow!"