When a plane is having turbulence it’s just the pilot Shaking the steering
My friend Amir didn’t have the greatest driving record because of all the car crashes he got in. He only crashed his plane once in a building. So he had a much better flying record.
(just a joke) My grandfather was involved in 9/11. I’ve kept his pilot medals for how good of a pilot he was.
According to all known laws of aviation,
there is no way a bee should be able to fly.
Its wings are too small to get its fat little body off the ground.
The bee, of course, flies anyway
because bees don't care what humans think is impossible.
Yellow, black. Yellow, black. Yellow, black. Yellow, black.
Ooh, black and yellow! Let's shake it up a little.
Barry! Breakfast is ready!
Ooming!
Hang on a second.
Hello?
- Barry? - Adam?
- Oan you believe this is happening? - I can't. I'll pick you up.
Looking sharp.
Use the stairs. Your father paid good money for those.
Sorry. I'm excited.
Here's the graduate. We're very proud of you, son.
A perfect report card, all B's.
Very proud.
Ma! I got a thing going here.
- You got lint on your fuzz. - Ow! That's me!
- Wave to us! We'll be in row 118,000. - Bye!
Barry, I told you, stop flying in the house!
The last time I had flying lessons I hit some building in Manhattan. Then my Uncle got shot in 2008. Darn...
2 fe male mouse met and one spoke yesterday I met a mouse he was black and he had wings and he had some cool sharp teeth he said he only at night
other mouse : ummm...thats a bat
that asshole he told me that he is a pilot
What did one plane say to the other?
It’s been a Long day, I’m ready to crash.
Other plane: No you’re not, we haven’t even gotten high yet!
So this guy is talking to his buddy about his flying lessons. My first time in the air, my instructor informed me but he was an 8th degree black belt and homosexual, and if I don't succumb to his sexual advances I would have to jump out of the plane, and his buddy says "well did you jump?"the guy says yeah, a little at first.
Why did the plane crash in the ocean? Because the pilot saw steward Undercut!
I told my friend to fly a plane,
But he threw a ramp of a roof
Teacher: Ok class, I'm going to ask a question about your family.
Alex: Miss, my Dad died in 9/11.
Teacher: OH NO, I'M SO SORRY!
Alex: Don't worry miss. It was only Dad and besides, he did what he wanted before he died.
Teacher: What was that?
Alex: Flew the plane.
So, I was getting on a plane, and the pilot does his usual speech talking about altitude and what not with the microphone, and he forgets to turn it off, so after the speech I heard him and the co pilot talking about what they were doing after work, and whatnot, then the pilot said he was dying for a blowjob and a coffee, so a stewardess ran to the pilots cabin, and then left about 15 minutes later, and the pilot shouted "Next time don't forget the coffee!"
Q) What did the airplane say to the little boy? A) Nothing, airplanes don't talk!
Imperial Pilot: What do you think about the new Tie fighter? Palpatine: Flew it.
People joke about 9/11, but it's not funny. My dad died in 9/11. Best pilot in Saudi Arabia.
The greatest Doctor, smartest man, young geek, and inspiring preacher are on a plane. The pilot dies of a heart attack, and is confirmed by the doctor. But, there are only 3 parachutes on the plane. The doctor takes one and says,
"People need me for my excellent medicine!" and jumps out. The smart man grab one and shouts,
"People are in need of my great knowledge!" and jumps out. There is only one more parachute on the plane. The preacher says to the geek,
"You are to young. Take the final parachute and go." The geek instead says,
"No, there are two parachutes left, the 'smart' one took my backpack."
A blonde crashed a helicopter. A police officer asked her what happened. She says, "It got cold so I turned off the fan."
Wanna hear a plane joke? Nah, it'll just go over your head.
How does a turkey drive a car? He wings it.
My great grandfather died in 9/11.
He was an amazing pilot.
