New Piece Of Cake Jokes

Every time someone calls me fat, I get so depressed I cut myself... a piece of cake.

Do you wanna know how I recently seduced an obese woman? Actually, it was a piece of cake.

MU, I love your joke, but I cut myself a piece of cake, pie, steak, cheesecake, and anything else I can find.

Every time someone calls me fat I get so depressed I cut myself...

A piece of cake.

Scientists are trying to find a cure for anorexics. It should be a piece of cake!

You also have to learn to say no. For example: "Would you like a piece of cake?" "No, I'd like two."

I cannot believe no one's come up with a cure for anorexia yet. I thought it would be a piece of cake!

Fake emo: when I’m sad, I cut myself.

Real emo: same.

Fake emo: another piece of cake.

When I feel depressed, I like to cut myself another piece of cake.

In the beginning of the 20th century, a young girl called Edit left her home country of Sweden and crossed the Ocean to make a new life in America. Unfortunately, it did not go all that well, and she soon found herself homeless, begging for food or money to survive.

She used to occupy a street next to a theater, not because it meant hefty handouts, but because it was a place where no other beggars or police bothered her. Every night, a new crowd came to see a show, and the cute young girl found just enough mercy to survive. In fact, she did so well that she decided to afford herself a small piece of cake every Tuesday, just to keep her spirits up.

One Tuesday, she could not get a break. Looked like she will go without cake this week. Then, a strange-looking gentleman stopped near her. He soon heard her story and decided to share his fortune.

Gentleman: "I work as a magician in the touring show; today, we performed here. Some nights, our guests want to gamble with us afterwards, and I make sure to bring home more than I came with. I try to keep it moderate, but today, this obnoxious drunk was loaded, so I emptied his pockets. Here, take this precious coin."