Pick Up jokes
"WASSUP GIRLS IF I FIND YOU I'LL GLADLY FUCK YOU;]"
Rizz
Are you a basketball hoop? 'Cause I want to put my balls in you.
Are you a photo biographer? 'Cause I can picture us together.
Rizz,
Are you a biographer? Cause I picture us together.
Can I take a picture of you for I can show Santa what I want for Christmas?
No pen, no paper, you still draw my attention.
You know what I hate about math? They always talk about x and y, but not about u and i.
I hope you know CPR, because you are taking my breath away!
Hey girl, are you suicide? 'Cause I think of you everyday.
Me: What do we need from there? I have a few things to do before I head out to the store, and then I will be home to pick up the stuff.
Random person: What stuff? 🤨
Me: What?
The person: You said you’re going to pick up “the stuff”!!! What do you mean by that?!
Me: Colourful flamingo fart.
What's the difference between a newborn baby and an orphan after a rugby match?
They both come out bloody and crying, but at least one gets picked up.
Are you the Twin Towers?
Because I want to smash you.
"You're really hot, I wanna hit on you like the plane hit the Twin Towers."
School Rizz:
You are my exam. I am always thinking about you but never making a move.
What do orphans and apples not have in common... The apples get picked up.
Are you the Twin Towers? Because I'd smash.
Hey, are you suicide? Because I want to do you!
(Best pick-up line ever). Your body is like 9/11. I wanna crash into your twin towers. 😏
Jack and Jill went up the hill to smoke some marijuana.
Jack got high and slapped his thigh and said, "You know you wanna."
Jill said yes, picked up her dress and said, "Let's have some fun!"
Silly ole Jill forgot her pill, and now they have a son.
My wife (or husband) told me to get six cans of Sprite from the grocery store.
I had just realized when I got home that I had picked up 7-Up.
Is your name suicide because I think about you all the time?
A young boy was picked up by a strange young man who put him in his car and drove into an abandoned farm.
"This place looks scary," the kid said.
And the man replies, "I know right, I have to walk out of there alone."
The police department made a new machine that will teleport you back to prison if you commit a crime. The police release 4 criminals: a hacker, a rapist, a serial killer, and a drug lord. The hacker tries to hack a bank. The hacker gets teleported back to prison. The drug lord tries to cook meth. The drug lord gets teleported back to prison. Now the serial killer decides that she wants to change, but when she sees a knife she just can’t help it. She bends down to pick up the knife and the rapist gets teleported back to prison.
Are you George Floyd?
'Cause baby, you take my breath away... OOF!