Physics jokes
I was bullying Stephen Hawking. I told him, "Why not stand up for yourself?"
The water in the shower evaporates before it reaches you.
Who will hit the ground first, the girl or the apple?
I don't know, it depends if the girl is emo or not. If she is emo, the rope will catch her.
I threw my boomerang and now I live in constant fear.
It's so sad that Stephen Hawking has a whole category on here about him and he can't stand up for himself.
Memes
What is Stephen Hawking's best side?
The left.
I walk into my driveway. Stephen Hawking is on my roof.
Oh wait, never mind, he just fell.
What’s the difference between a hot potato and a flying pig?
One’s a heated yam, and the other’s a YEATED HAM!
What's Stephen Hawking's favorite shampoo?
Head and Shoulders.
Did you walk up Stephen Hawking's drive?
Don’t worry, he didn’t either.
What's Stephen Hawking called on fire?
Hot Wheels :)
Stephen Hawking, more like ice cream!
Why does Stephen Hawking only do one liners?
He can't do stand-ups.
What were Stephen Hawking's last words?
*Windows turning off*
Stairs.
Stephen Hawking can't stand stairs.
What’s impossible?
Steven Walkings.
Why is it that a physically disabled gay white male will refuse to ask his boss that is an abled bodied gay white male for an increase in his paycheck?
Since he has a very big white dick in his mouth, that could be the reason why.
If a gay male is married to a well-endowed, physically challenged gay male that has been sleeping in bed for three hours nonstop, and he wants him to wake up so he can fix him his morning breakfast, how does he wake him up?
Wake up sleeping Jesus by giving him a blowjob.
Yo mama so fat, she has her own gravitational pull.
How did Stephen Hawking die?
His PC overheated.