Physics jokes
Why does Stephen Hawking only do one liners?
He can't do stand-ups.
You're so skinny the world turns to the left!
How do stars get their name?
By a black hole because it's sueeeee!
Look behind you, there is Stephen Hawking.
Nobody.
When I wear all black, I'm not emo. I'm a rainbow, 'cause I'm wearing all the colors. #Science
So Stephen Hawking walks into a bar... Ha!
What’s the difference between a hot potato and a flying pig?
One’s a heated yam, and the other’s a YEATED HAM!
What is Stephen Hawking's best side?
The left.
I walk into my driveway. Stephen Hawking is on my roof.
Oh wait, never mind, he just fell.
What's Stephen Hawking's favorite shampoo?
Head and Shoulders.
What were Stephen Hawking's last words?
*Windows turning off*
What's Stephen Hawking called on fire?
Hot Wheels :)
Stairs.
Stephen Hawking can't stand stairs.
Did you walk up Stephen Hawking's drive?
Don’t worry, he didn’t either.
Stephen Hawking's best subjects were Physics and Maths. His worst was P.E.
Knock knock. Who's there? Stephen Hawking. Wheelie?
Knock knock.
Who's there?
It's me. I can't get in because Stephen Hawking is in the way.
If a gay male is married to a well-endowed, physically challenged gay male that has been sleeping in bed for three hours nonstop, and he wants him to wake up so he can fix him his morning breakfast, how does he wake him up?
Wake up sleeping Jesus by giving him a blowjob.
I’d tell BlessedBrian to aim for the stars, but it seems like his GRAVITATIONAL PULL is holding him back.
Yo mama so fat, she has her own gravitational pull.