Physics jokes
Yo mama so fat that when she sits on the beach, she sinks!
Today I got a lecture from my mother, and congratulated her. Why?
Because she managed not to damage me in a physical fashion.
What’s the most terrifying word in nuclear physics?
Oops!
What do you call a physically disabled man who is sitting on the toilet inside the handicapped stall inside the men's restroom?
Sex worker.
Who is the definition of a natural-born cocksucker?
A bisexual male, a homosexual male, a bisexual female, or a heterosexual female?
A physically disabled heterosexual male.
Yo mama is so fat that when she walks, she causes earthquakes. She is so big that she has her own zip code and gravity field. She is so heavy that she needs a crane to get out of bed. She is so obese that she can't fit in any clothes, except for a circus tent. She is so large that she blocks the sun and causes eclipses.
If a physically handicapped gay white male is sitting on the toilet in the handicapped stall, and if you are a gay white male that is well-endowed that is not physically handicapped, and if you want the physically handicapped gay white male who is sitting on the toilet in the handicapped stall to suck your dick, what do you do to convince him to suck your dick if you have a hard on and your horny as hell?
Put $25.00 under the handicapped stall before you put your dick under the handicapped stall.
Ur mum is so fat that when she lived in a flat on the highest floor, she fell through the inner floor.
You're so fat when you step, you break the galaxy.
How do you make a trash can leak?
Hit it with an axe until it becomes part of the cosmos!
What’s black and at the top of a stair case?
Stephen Hawking during a house fire.
If the sun is in space, then why is there light on Earth, but not in space?
Why is there only a glory hole in the handicapped stall in some public men's restrooms?
Because a gay man that is not physically handicapped can't receive a blow job from a gay man that is physically handicapped under the handicapped stall.
What gets bigger when it eats but dies when it drinks?
Answer: fire.
An apple and an emo girl fall from the same height in a tree. Which one hits the ground first? The apple, cuz the noose stops her.
Why is Newton not allowed to visit local farms?
The owners know that forces come in pears.
What did the neutron say to the atom?
"Sandwiches, dude!"
A donut is not empty inside, that was a hole in the middle. If I'm a donut, the hole used to be where I put my feeling and happiness, but people snatch it away from me.
Anyway, can someone put a hole in my physical body too? I kinda wanted to see people cry for me just like how people cry for Ace from One Piece.
You're so skinny, when you did your first jump on a pogo stick you would never come back.
I'm no astronomer, but I’m pretty sure the Earth revolves around the sun... not you.