"911, what’s your emergency?" I asked, listening to the quiet sobs of a little kid on the other end of the line.
“I think my daddy want to kill me,” the girl said and cried, making me freeze on the spot as I recognized my daughter’s voice.
I saw a kid with no phone. I gave him an iPhone 14.
Except it had no home button.
I asked my phone why I couldn't get a date.
It showed a picture of myself.
I bet emo kids are jealous when their phone dies.
What do you call 2 wings and a halo?
A Chinese phone call: "Wing wing halo!" 🤪
Why can Asian people buy phones?
'Cause they might call the wrong number.
Why can’t orphans use a phone? Because they can't find the home button.
What is an orphans hated movie line? E.T phone home
Teacher: I’m gonna call ur parents Orphan: go on see if they pick up
(Phone call) This is Frank's funeral home and grill, where yesterday's grief is today's beef. How may we help you?
Just got an iPhone 12 for my brother, best trade I've ever made.
I knew a girl that died from having phone sex.... He died of hearing aids
When Chuck Norris calls 1-900 and 976 numbers, he doesn't get charged. He holds up the phone, and money falls out.
Today, I was at the Apple Store when I saw that a lot of phones were broken. When I looked around, I saw none other than Pristiano Penaldo smashing all the phones. He said he was mad because he ghosted vs a relegation team. Shame on you, Penaldo!
Official Dj Penaldo playlist.
1. "I'm a fraud" 2. "I need you (ft. Tap-ins)" 3. "I Want to Leave Mid United" 4. "Back where I belong (ft. Europa league)" 5. "TY Eder" 6. "Nobody wants me (Rejectnaldo Remix)" 7. "Fuck that kid (ft. Lil Broke phone)" 8. "Sewy (Benched +arms crossed version)"
How does a depressed couple say goodbye on the phone?
"No, you hang yourself first..."
Chinese teacher phone rang going to class and he said My phone the Ring Ring it's my wife Ring Ring
What's in common with Michael Jackson and a phone?
Kids play with both of them.
My friend asked, "What's that on your arm?" I replied, "Oh, this? I didn't have enough storage on my phone to download Fruit Ninja so I had to improvise a little bit."
Your forehead is so big it blocked my phone service!
