Personal

Personal jokes

Background

"Oh, you’re still talking? I thought background noise was supposed to fade out after a while. Must be tough waking up every day knowing your personality was a failed experiment."

Autistic person

Why should you put an autistic person in a refrigerator?

Because otherwise you’ll get a rotten vegetable.

(Not meant to be triggering).

Birthday

Everyone when we're in the cafeteria singing happy birthday to some random person: "Happy birthday to you..., Happy birthday to you, happy birthday dear

Me in the background: Happy deathday to you..., Happy deathday to you, happy death day dear___, happy death day to you!"

Midget

What's the difference between a midget and a tall person? Only one of them can ride the rides.

Memes

Name

How do you name a Chinese person?

You drop a metal spoon on a tile floor.

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  • Brain

    Clarie: I don't even care if it was a joke he made on me, you and Karlen, and if you think I'm getting over it, then you must have an oatmeal for a brain.

    Jordan: Clarie ... you are so sensitive when she tells a little joke about you, me, and Karlen.

    Clarie: It was painful!

    Jordan: Who cares? I laughed. Ben is not a bad person, okay, calm down.

    Clarie: Ben is a bad person. We are making friends with a bully/thug, but you say that he is not a "bad person", my mom is going to kill me if she finds out that I am hanging out with those kinds of people!

    Jordan: Then don't tell her! Listen, I need you, give Ben a chance! Please?

    Clarie: Shush, Karlen is coming!

    Karlen: Hey guys, that Ben guy for sure has a way of saying words, I wish I could hurt him!!

    Apology

    Ok, so I know most or all of you guys hate me, and that's fine. You guys most likely know me as a horrible person, which I don't know where you would hear that from.

    And finally, I am truly a good person; you just need to know me better. The only reason I fought Tina and Jack was because I was trying to be nice to another guy. Then I realized what side I should have been on. I'm pretty sure everyone on this hates me. Just I'm sorry, and just forgive me. Alya, Tina, Jack, and someone else, I think all are nice people; they just stick up for each other, and that's what I realized. So if you still hate me, it's fine; I'll be leaving this app soon, maybe. Hate makes me sad, even though I use it, but I know what was wrong. I want to join the good side, so just give a chance. This was watersharky's Apologies.

    Bus

    A bus full of ugly people is driving down the street. The bus crashes and everyone goes to heaven. They see Saint Peter, and he feels bad for them and grants them one wish before they go into heaven. The first one says, "I wish to be attractive." The second one says the same.

    Meanwhile, the 3rd person in line is giggling and snickering and laughing while Saint Peter is granting wishes. Curiously, he asks why he is laughing. He says, "I was going to wish that they turned ugly again."

    Dad

    What do you get when you put a clown, a peodophile, a gay wet person?

    Answer: YOUR DAD

    Bar

    A blind person walks into a bar.

    Because they can’t see where they are going.

    Difference

    What's the difference between a Black person and a White person?

    One has a dad, while the other searches.

    Darkness

    Katie Price's answer for everything is darkness.

    She isn't a dull person, but playing eye spy with my little eye with Harvey is just way too easy.

    Man

    What do you call a gay man that performs fellatio on a man and cunnilingus on a woman, a person who is curious about male bisexuality, a man that is bicurious?

    Does it cycle now?

    Difference

    What's the difference between a Black person and a White person? Nothing, are you racist?

    Koala

    Q: What’s a koala's face song? A: Never gonna give you up BECAUSE it hangs on the tree and the person is the tree?

    Insult

    Gwen, don't worry, everyone hates you, by the way! Have anything to say? Then who cares? You can't stop me.

    Unknown person is going to give you a hint of who hates you...we were in a club, a meeting...btw this is you!

    [Image of Gwen]

    Later, Bitch!!!!!!!!

    Man

    Paralyzed Man: *gets up* I’m out of here!

    Blind Man: Did that paralyzed man just get up?

    Deaf Man: Did that Blind Man see that paralyzed man get up?

    Mute Man: Did that deaf man just hear the blind man see the paralyzed man get up?

    Dead Man: Did that mute man just say did that deaf man just hear the blind man see the paralyzed man get up?

    “Normal” Man: Did that dead man hear the mute man say did that deaf man hear the blind man see the paralyzed man get up?

    Doctor: *calls 911*

    911 service: 911 what’s your emergency?

    Doctor: Yes, uh, a “normal” person just said that did that dead man just hear a mute man say did that deaf man just hear the blind man see a paralyzed man get up?

    911 service: *hangs up*