People jokes

Humor is like skin; the darker it gets, the less people like it.

Why can't Chinese people play baseball?

Because they ate the bat.

People ask me, "Are you an organ donor?"

"Yeah, over my dead body!"

What do you call plane crash victims?

Down to earth people.

Guys, I know how to stop racism. Delete the word "racism." People can't be something that doesn't exist.

The COVID-19 situation has been especially stressful for the Flat Earth Society.

They fear that social distancing measures could push people over the edge.

What do ninjas and depressed people have in common?

They're always cutting.

My friend said that gay people existed 10 years ago.

He can tell the future.

How many people fit in a tree?

I don't know, you tell me.

What happened to people in Hiroshima and Nagasaki? They swapped races.

You're so fat, when you wear a yellow raincoat, people call out, "TAXI!"

What do you call my friends?...

Short.

Me when people ask how old my girlfriends are:

"There's 2, there're 4, there're 6, there're 8."

Ever had that feeling that suicidal people are a big contributor to the razor blade industry?

Well, they aren't.

Why?

They aren't repeated customers.

Why do some people hate camping?

It's in tents.

I only have a few friends, like if you relate.

Based on a true story.

Why did Hitler never go to a strip club?

Because he hated the Poles!

If your controller ever dies, remember those people that died on the submersible.

Why do they call them a nonce?

Because they go for people who don't have any sense.

What is it called when you have four white people in the car?

Clear windows.