People jokes
The people at 9/11 must have been able to read fast. If I explain it, it won't be funny. This is an old joke my friend told me.
Every single person on the plane died except for 2. How is that possible?
It said all the single people died; the 2 were a couple. That's how it was possible.
Where do short people disappear on the first of December?
Santa's Workshop.
Why do homeless people commit crimes?
They get a bed in jail.
Hello guys!
Please help, my dad is an addict. He won't stop, and he eats my food.
Sometimes I think, should I kill him? But nah, he will go down with the others who did that too.
Yo mama is so fat when she sees a bus full of white people, she thinks it's a Twinkie, lmao xd.
A bus full of ugly people is driving down the street. The bus crashes and everyone goes to heaven. They see Saint Peter, and he feels bad for them and grants them one wish before they go into heaven. The first one says, "I wish to be attractive." The second one says the same.
Meanwhile, the 3rd person in line is giggling and snickering and laughing while Saint Peter is granting wishes. Curiously, he asks why he is laughing. He says, "I was going to wish that they turned ugly again."
What is Alan Turing's reincarnation doing?
Getting revenge for what some people said about him being gay.
When fat people sit down at a restaurant, and you listen closely, you can hear the chair screaming.
Why do people make orphan jokes... their parents will get mad... oh wait, never mind, please continue.
People ask me, "Are you an organ donor?"
"Yeah, over my dead body!"
Why don’t Chinese people model? Because it would look like the same model every time.
Why do people who get shot in the head always become therapists?
They are more open-minded.
Stop with dumb orphan jokes, you dumb ass people!!!!!!!!!!
They're not funny one bit, so stop!!!!!!!!!!!!!
What do Spider-Man and suicidal people have in common?
They both hang.
What do you call the United States of America under a Joe Biden presidency?
Answer: The Democratic People’s Socialist States of America. We're still America, just a different kind of America. And that’s no joke. 😔
Why are the people that get your order at restaurants called waiters? They don't wait for the food; we wait for the food. They should be called "note takers." They take notes for food.
Did you know that graveyards are the most popular place in the world? Yeah, people are just DYING to get in there...
Did you know the Alabama Crimson Tide University has the most handicapped people? You know their motto, "Roll Tide."