People jokes
Don't worry if you think your life sucks. Just remember that people are arguing over the gender of a potato head.
Me: *opens a bag of hot Cheetos in class*
All my friends: Hey bro, can I have some?
People I don't know: Please lemme have some. PLEASE, I'll be your best friend!
People I say no to: (⊙-⊙)(⊙-⊙)(⊙-⊙)(⊙-⊙)(⊙-⊙)(⊙-⊙)
The Americans.
What's the similarity between dogs and poor people?
They both eat from trash.
Why don't Japanese people like iPhones?
Because they are afraid of American airdrops.
It's quite ironic that people tell you "Happy Birthday," then they want to give you a spanking.
When the school shooter kills five people, and the autistic kid yells, "Heroes never die!"
When you’re hiding from the school shooter next to people who made fun of you for having an Android: “HEY SIRI”
Hey, who thinks Gwen is a dummy, so is Jaden and Kenya!
People tell Kobe to fly high, but when he flew high, he died.
Why is death taken so lightly? It's terrible how people use it! (This is NOT a joke!)
Is it just me, or is it normal to you when people scream?
Hey, wake up. I just murdered your family, but I live alone.
Then who are these people in your house? They are people in my house? Well, not anymore, dumb bitch. You're welcome, you could have died.
Why are all fat people bad drivers?
They are all hungover.
Why can't white people post jokes about making fun of black people, but black people can post jokes about making fun of white people?
Because white people have white privilege.
What do rednecks and deaf people have in common?
Don’t care wtf you say or listen to shit you say😂
Why are midgets short?
'Cause they are!
Boy: *scares girl*
Girl: "Gosh, you scared me, Jesus!"
Jesus: *Arrives out of nowhere and said, "What is it, human? I got work to do."*
Girl: What work?
Jesus: "Coming out of nowhere when people say 'Jesus.'"
GBM when he sees Soph (gets a boner) and has sex with Soph but realizes he forgot to put on a condom. Soph: "This is why Arsenal fans are so deluded and retarded."
Normal Fans after they lose the game: Good game, you guys played really well. GBM: "BRO REF WHAT THE BLOODY HELL YOU DELUDED ASS RETARD, OMFG WE LOST BECAUSE OF THIS REF!"
Adapt: Hey Adapt, did you know you're smart? Smart for being retarded. Yo Adapt!! You're so stupid that you gave me your Roblox account info and you said thanks about it!!
Barca fans after the LFC vs Barca game: We bottled it, damn it, we'll win the Copa Del Rey tho. Commie after the LFC vs Barca game: "YOU NEVER WALK ALONEEEEEEEEEE" Normal People: I support only 1 team. Commie: I support Barca, LFC, and AEK!! And I'm the biggest plastic in the server!!
Why are people so good at basketball? They can run, steal, and shoot!