Pedophile jokes
What kind of file turns a 5mm hole into a 3cm hole?
A pedo-file.
What did the pretty young pre-pubescent 14 year old boy say when he got a homosexual pedophile for Christmas?
He said he was awfully touched!
Two pedophiles are on a beach.
One says to the other, "Move over, you're in my sun!"
What did the priest say when he walked into an elementary school?
Let us prey.
How can you be friends with a pedophile that's a musician?
B minor.
What do an angler fish and a pedophile have in common?
They both like to hide in dark places, look creepy, and like to lure small creatures.
What does a paedophile say when he gets to heaven?
A: Where's the holy baby?
Why can’t pedophiles ever win races? Because they are always coming in a little behind.
What did the pedophile say to the kids?
"FUCK!"
You know why pedophiles get away with molesting children?
Because who are they gonna tell? Not their parents.
"You gotta bleed before you teeth."
- Santa Claus
My girlfriend broke up with me yesterday. I asked her why. She said, "Because you're a pedophile." I replied, "Pedophile! That's a big word for an eight year old."
Why did the pedophile cross the road?
Because there was a school on the other side.
I give props to pedophiles.
They always go slow in the school zones.
What shoes does a pedophile wear?
White vans.
What's the most between my uncle and aunt?
My aunt waited until I was 14 to come on my face.
People can say whatever they want about pedophiles. At least they are pursuing their dreams.
In a white van.
Did you know that, statistically, 1 in 10 people live next door to a pedophile? Not me though, not me though; I live next door to a lil 10 year old boy with a FAT ASS yenno what I'm sayin'???
Two pedophiles meet each other. Then one asks if he wanted to trade "2 of 5" for "1 of 10?"
What's a pedophile's favorite cooking ingredient?...... Fresh meat.