My girlfriend called me a pedophile... That's a big word for a 1st grader.
What kind of file turns a 5mm hole into a 3cm hole?
A pedo-file.
What do you say to a pedophile at the beach?
Get out of my son!
What is a pedophile's favorite dating site?
Kinder
Pedophile: You dropped your candy.
Girl: Thanks!
Pedophile stares as she slowly bends over to pick up her candy.
Pedophile: It looks a bit dirty, do you wanna come back to my house and get a new one?
Girl: How far is your house?
Pedophile: It's that white one right over there.
Girl: You mean that van next to a dumpster?
Pedophile: Yep, it's that one.
Girl:.... Sure! :P
Audience:.........Dumbass girl.
Child predators: "You're so six-y."
Pedophiles smell good.
Him: *slowly drives past elementary school while looking at kids*
Her: Why are you staring at those kids? *jokingly* Are you like a pedophile or something?
Him: ... At least you know why I love calling you "baby" now~
My girlfriend called me a pedophile, but what does she know? She's 7.
A pedophile lures a group of Houston Girl Scouts with "Hey girls, would you like some candy?" They all agree and follow him to his neighborhood. There he offers them some more candy and they follow him to his house. Once again he offers them candy to go in to his house. In the lounge he offers them candy to go to his room. As he leads them up the stairs one of them pipes up and says "God, I hope we get laid before we get diabetes."
Pedophiles are fucking immature assholes.
My girlfriend broke up with me yesterday. I asked her why. She said, "Because you're a pedophile." I replied, "Pedophile! That's a big word for an eight year old."
What's a pedophile's favorite holiday?
Halloween. Free delivery!
What do a pedophile and a clock have in common? Neither of them go past 12.
What does the pedophile use for bait? Trix!
What is pedophiles' favorite prey: Vegetables?
You people are sick!!!!!!!!!!!!!! None of these are funny. Sick sick sick!!!!!!!
Two pedophiles are on a beach.
One says to the other, "Move over, you're in my sun!"
Kill yourself!
The judge asked me, "How does 5 to 10 years sound?"
I said, "Sexy."
