who wanna be my boyfriend
What's the difference between a girlfriend and a wife?
120 pounds.
I always say I'm single, which annoys my wife.
Looking for true love. Must be into fun, likes to go out driving, playing the latest catching game and most importantly, must love kids. (PEADOPHILES MUST APPLY WITH HOW MANY KIDS YOU CAN CARRY!)
Did you know that "girlfriend" at the end, it starts with "end." So does "boyfriend," and "friend" have "end" at the end of it, but "family" at the end it "ily" I love you.
My girlfriend asked me to write her a poem for Valentines Day:
Roses are red, Watches are gold. Get on your knees, And do as you're told.
Why do some couples make their status "single" after a small argument? Like, I don't put "orphan" after I get into an argument with my family.
My girlfriend is like treasure to me.
You need a shovel to find her.
When you’re trying to attract a partner, it’s important to project the qualities you desire. Shit, have I had to suck a lot of cock lately!?
My girlfriend and I played Russian Roulette once.
We had sex afterwards even though she lost.
Love is the best picture you can use to be able for her and I was able for her in the best place for her and I have to be honest and a great team of the team and the way it goes is the first 4th year of my life in my life as a new 💕.
Why is it hard having a relationship with an astronaut?
Because they are always so distant. :-]
I asked my girlfriend if she wanted to join my family tree... She dropped the rope and ran.
What do you say to your partner with diabetes?
Hey, sugar!
I was in a toxic relationship. After some time, my girlfriend died. Her name was Happy. Still got no clue of her body, and here I am lying on the bed so fucking happy.
I asked my lab partner for sodium hypobromate, but he said, "Na Br O."
There was a woman named Sally. She loved to have sex with other people. One time, she had sex with me. I noticed her bra size was 69 (+69). That is fucking big!
Ok, then when her partner was pissing, he told her she should call the doctor. So she dialed 2063512000 (+2000) and called the doctor. The office was on 51st street ave NE (+51). Holy shit, the doctor said! The boots were so big that she had to take 8 pills (x 8). The next morning, she was ________.
69 + 51 + 2000 x 8 = 16120
58008 (flip calculator)
Boobless.
I guess age is just a number, but in your boyfriend's case, a personal preference.
Wife: Honey, I love you.
Husband: I love you all.
Wife: Awww.......... Wait WHAT?!?!??!
Why did Karen leave me?
Because I was a mushroom.
